Need To Know 2001-08-17

archive

"Developers, developers, developers developers developers developers. Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers [INDISTINCT - poss. "developers"]. Yes." - STEVE BALLMER, CEO of Microsoft, presents another stirring keynote http://www.ntk.net/ballmer/mirrors.html >> HARD NEWS << thar she blews Well done to THE INDUSTRY STANDARD for slavishly improving on the original "Wired" business model - despite all the money wasted on short-lived European editions, the humble Wired UK operation never quite realised its ultimate goal of taking down the parent organism as well. But, as any keen new-economy bullshitter knows, adversity can often breed innovation - innovation like the bold new revenue stream proposed by Future Publishing's US incarnation, IMAGINE MEDIA, who seem to be charging between $500 and $5,000 per program for inclusion on forthcoming coverdisks of PC Gamer, MaximumPC, MacAddict and Official Xbox magazines. This "is not an advertising fee", an email, addressed to "Software Partners", explains - it is "a Distribution and Handling fee", which only happens to apply to "editorially selected disc content". And thank heavens for that, because when Amazon tried something similar a couple of years ago, the term everyone else seemed to prefer was "payola". http://www.ntk.net/2001/08/17/imaginethat.txt - "the publishing company that created coverdiscs". Uh-huh. http://service.imaginemedia.com/info.html - not exactly a great year for them so far http://www.ntk.net/2001/08/17/dohstandard.jpg - wish we had a copy of the "no more staff limos" mail Is that free speech burning, or just the spreading haze of DMCA smoke we smell? A fairly clear-cut case in Holland with Niels Ferguson, the Dutch cryptographer who knows how broken Intel's new content protection system is, but is too scared to tell anyone. But what about the curious case of ALEX SHTOL's WMA ENCODE/DECODER program? Alex's shareware app, which can create and export to MP3 Windows Media audio files, was removed from CNET's DOWNLOAD.COM last month without explanation. CNET now says that it's been deleted because it's in breach of the DMCA. In fact, WMA Decode/Encode is licensed by Microsoft to perform what deciphering it does, and is deliberately limited to comply with the requirements of their Digital Rights Management system. Compared to the fistful of other audio-decoding progs still on DOWNLOAD.COM, it's a veritable paragon of DMCA compliance. Of course, its country of origin is a little more exotic than its competitors: could it be that following Dmitry Sklyarov's arrest, CNET now thinks *all* programs from Moscow are illegal? http://www.macfergus.com/niels/dmca/ - Intel will just have to work it out for themselves http://12.108.175.91/ebookweb/stories/storyReader$388 - You're *not* scared, you're just pretending, says Seybold http://www.x-filez.com/dmcacnet.htm - scary enough for you? Three reasons why RAZORFISH are the "Queen Mother" of new media: 1. The press love them - they can always be relied on for an "Oh, that's so cute" story; 2. Mere mention of their name conjures up upsetting mental imagery involving hideous teeth; and 3. Despite remarkable longevity so far, they're surely not going to be around *for ever*. On the off-chance that the current round of rumours turn out to be true and Razorfish *are* currently on the ropes, NTK would like to collect your recollections (and documentary evidence) of their most freakish projects and campaigns, just in case a last- minute "tribute" portfolio is required. For instance, we're convinced we can detect their distinctive fingerprints on that RAC relaunch ad which revealed that the Royal Automobile Club was no longer just some blokes in vans who fix your car when you break down, but (we're paraphrasing, of course) "a radical new paradigm in journey assurance en route from A to B". http://www.observer.com/pages/envelope.asp - like those Popbitch "I Love The '80s" specials http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/8.09/razorfish.html - but, in net time, about 3 or 4 years ago >> ANTI-NEWS << berating the obvious "Collision damage waiver" on Teletext flights? I'm not going: www.teletextholidays.co.uk/holiday_offers_details.asp?OID=408289&area=general ... "Sir has requested the 'dead rock star' suite - very good, Sir": http://www.select.with-us.com/fullstory.cfm?id=161 ... WORLDPOP proactively sends registered users its (entire?) mailing list of 20,000 email addresses, under "Subject: How To Pull At A Festival"... Oi! Coldplay! Keep that noise DOWN!: http://www.glastonburyfestivals.co.uk/2001/whatson.html ... NME sees "abstract pattern with vaguely gothic overtones... sonic cathedral" in particle paths from CERN bubble chamber: http://www.nme.com/NME/External/News/News_Story/0,1004,39946,00.html ... Leonardo da Vinci way ahead of his time (see synopsis): http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0201735008/ ... "we know about every other technology in use today *and in the future*": http://www.kisstechnologies.co.uk/company/people.asp ... summertime - when "bugs the size of pixels" STRIKE AGAIN!: http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/sci/tech/newsid_1493000/1493152.stm vs http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/sci/tech/newsid_842000/842624.stm ... Improve Your Image step #1 - write everything ALL IN CAPS: http://www.scottish.internetradio.co.uk/userpages/imagemakers.html - step #2: choose a reputable, professional service provider: http://www.scottish.internetradio.co.uk/userpages/ ... another satisfied customer: http://www.harrogatetheatre.co.uk/ ... yup, we're *still* calling them "Widdecombe of the week": http://www.streetmap.co.uk/streetmap.dll?Postcode2Map?sw1a+1aa&your+HTML+here ... "Ask Coca-Cola" at http://www.coke.com/ spills the beans: http://www.ntk.net/2001/08/17/dohcoke.gif ... relax lads - she's a man: http://www.shell-me.com/july2001/news-world2.htm#worldnews6 >> EVENT QUEUE << goto's considered non-harmful Displaying the unerring eye for the contemporary zeitgeist that is the hallmark of all great artists, HEATH "BUNTY" BUNTING has given up that unconvincing "genetic modification" schtick and bounded onto the Linux bandwagon with DIY tech recycling workshop RUBBISH 2 ROUTER (from 1pm Tue 2001-08-21, Windmill City Farm, Bedminster, Bristol, free if you bring a screwdriver, pliers or soldering iron) - part of wireless- enabled artists get-together TECH 2 (from today, various venues around Bristol). Still, you'd probably intercept a few more interesting packets by "war driving" past the equally 802.11B-positive computer security gathering DNSCON 4 (from 1pm today, 2001-08-17, President Hotel, Blackpool, from UKP15), which we always mean to go to, if only to check out the now-mythical "Need To Know" bar. http://www.irational.org/cgi-bin/cv/cv.pl?member=heath - doesn't quite get Godel Incompleteness either http://cubecinema.com/rubbish2router.html - Redundant Tech Initiative know what they're doing though http://www.dnscon.org/dns4/ - and the "proof": http://www.ntk.net/2000/08/25/bar.html http://www.whatsonstage.com/uktw/page.php?page=details&id=L1152558442 - or save a trip to Edinburgh with the live "Blue Jam" show >> TRACKING << sufficiently advanced technology : the gathering In the thrashing Cambrian slime-pits of sourceforge, it's a little hard to tell which projects are worth getting involved with, and which are the "Last updated two days after they started" no-hopers. As a general rule, the bigger the ambition, the more doomed the codebase - but there are always exceptions. Even though they (barely) missed an deadline this week, tigris.org's SUBVERSION looks like it's going somewhere fast. A ongoing plan to replace CVS with a more modern, backwards-compatible, replacement, Sub has survived an ambitious schedule, strong competitors, a pitched battle between ESR and one of his supercriminal foes on the dev list, and a potentially dull wall of code to climb. They've survived. This week was due to be the date that Subversion became self-aware (or at least, self-hosting): despite a flurry of activity, they didn't quite make it. But they're very close - and now would be a great point to get involved. http://subversion.tigris.org/ - mmm WebDAV http://subversion.tigris.org/servlets/ReadMsg?msgId=34923&listName=dev - sooo close http://lwn.net/2001/features/KernelSummit/ - ..and Linus says he really likes the name. >> MEMEPOOL << hasta la altavista it's the battle of the hypnotically ill-advised voiceovers: http://www.zombo.com/ vs http://www.henryhendron.com/ ... www.bankofamerica.com/newsroom/press/press.cfm?PressID=press.20010813.03.htm imitates ONION story we can't find in their archive any more... http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/uk/newsid_1490000/1490957.stm imitates "The Dark Knight Returns" (Detective Inspector Paul Knight!)... http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_376025.html imitates EDWARD PENISHANDS *and* BRASS EYE... killer FLASH app found at last - blocky pictures dancing to foreign language soundtracks: http://www.btinternet.com/~david.st/b3ta/ , http://www.rathergood.com/vid/ , and most alarmingly of all: http://user.tninet.se/~prv247p/hatt/hatten.swf ... "Oh, the humanity": http://www.curlysairships.com/ ... anti-WAREZ propaganda goes retro: http://www.bsa.org/usa/megabyte/ ... EMINEM indigestion lyrics more accurate than we thought: http://www.purplepill.com/common/101.freecertificate.asp ... DIANA's flatmates so dodgy she wrote her name on all her CDs: http://www.itn.co.uk/news/20010816/britain/18burrell.shtml ... and drop-kick me, JESUS, through the goal posts of life: http://www.catholicsupply.com/christmas/football.html ... http://www.hammacher.com/sfi/2001/2001semifinalist.html winners (bottom of page) rivals (intermittently updated) http://www.unnovations.com ... hang on a minute - HOBBES is *imaginary*?: http://www.whatever-dude.com/posts/145.shtml ... the wit and wisdom of IRC - rated & preserved for all time: http://www.doomworld.com/phptest/bestquotes.php ... >> GEEK MEDIA << get out less TV>> clip-shows stalk the primetime schedules once again with Nadia Sawalahalaha's TOTAL SOAP (8.30pm, Fri, BBC1), HARRY ENFIELD'S GUIDE TO THE NORTH OF ENGLAND (9.30pm, Fri, BBC1), Public Enemy on an arguably anti-Semitic tip in LATER PRESENTS RHYTHMS OF ISLAM (11.35pm, Fri, BBC2), Jack Dee's funny advert round-up TRUST ME I'M A CELEBRITY (11.10pm, Fri, BBC1), plus BRITAIN'S TOP TEN MOST WANTED MURDERERS (8.30pm, Thu, ITV)... on Sat there's the bizarrely self-referential sight of Paul Ross and that goon from "Heat" Magazine mocking the transient appeal of TV personalities and Page 3 girls in CELEBRITY: THE RISE AND FALL (9.15pm, Sat, C4), up against I LOVE THE 90s (9.15pm, Sat, BBC2) - at this rate, expect "I Love The 2010s" early next year - and followed by Antipodean punditry AUSSIES: WHO GIVES A ****? (11.20pm, Sat, C4)... movie "highlights" include - who'd have thought it? - a "Terminator" knock off on C5 - THE TOMORROW MAN (6.10pm, Sat, C5), Dean Stockwell's Simon Quinlank impersonation in Harrison Ford aerial antic AIR FORCE ONE (9.15pm, Sat, BBC1), Scott "Con Air" Rosenberg's rom-com BEAUTIFUL GIRLS (9.50pm, Sun, BBC2), and Duchovny/ Michelle "Ensign Ro" Forbes arthouse road thriller KALIFORNIA (10.30pm, Mon, C4)... BBC2's Saturday morning ex-OU tech-slot is presumably profiling The Cult Of The Dead Cow in HACK THE PLANET (9am, Sat, BBC2)... "Biff" from "Back To The Future" grows up to be a PE teacher in the excellent FREAKS AND GEEKS (7pm, Mon-Fri, E4)... and they're clearly heeding their own advice in ADAM AND JOE'S GUIDE TO TAKING OVER TV (7.55pm, Tue- Wed, C4), as Joe then reappears hosting "Liquid News"-alike THIS WEEK ONLY (11.05pm, Thu, C4)... LIFTERS (9.50pm, Tue, BBC2) provides some handy tips on nicking stuff from shops... Darcus Howe whines on about our lack of freedom when it comes to protest and direct-action in SLAVE NATION (9pm, Wed, C4) ... and more top viewing for historical massacre fans, in the form of the concluding double-episode of THE WORLD AT WAR (7.10pm, Sun, BBC2), GREAT BATTLES OF WORLD WAR II (8pm, Wed, C5) and, after last week's showing of "Chasing Amy", a "Timewatch" special on BOMBING GERMANY (9pm, Thu, BBC2)... FILM>> Tim "Batman" Burton spectacularly botches another big franchise in remixed kid-friendly "unimagining" PLANET OF THE APES (http://www.capalert.com/capreports/planetoftheapes.htm : no nudity was found, only a case of excessive [Estella Warren] cleavage; the choreographers took full advantage of [Bonham] Carter's deep beautiful eyes; while men and women of all races are equally precious to Jesus, apes are not equal to us; + http://www.screenit.com/movies/2001/planet_of_the_apes.html : Phrases: "What the hell are you doing?", "Shut up" and "Damn them all to Hell"). It's actually not quite as lame as critics make out, apart from: 1. terrible acting and dialogue from all the humans (Tim Roth and Helena Bonham Carter are surprisingly good); 2. excessive wirework - you'll believe an ape can fly!; and 3. the inexplicable "twist ending" - so bad, it could almost be the work of Kevin Smith: [CAUTION - *MAJOR* SPOILER] http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,8669,00.html ... HAL-LOO! >> "I'm trying to repel the American media", announced EMMANUEL GOLDSTEIN, keynote at the quadrennial Dutch hackers' conference, HAL 2001, playing to audiences' favourite phenotype this year: self-deprecating Americans. "Don't ever say Americans aren't tolerant - we've been tolerating shit from our government for years", he chuckled. Most unexpected revelation from Manny: during the recent unpleasantness, 2600 was swamped with e-mail urging them to cyber attack China, all from Hotmail accounts. The X-Originating-IP fields turned out to be *all* from .mil domains.... JOHN GILMORE spoke both about opportunistic encryption, and other opportunities he has personally enjoyed as a friend of Sasha "MDMA" Shulgin... oddest (we presume unconnected) sight: a 6'6" cross-dressing Lara Croft-alike ... PHIL ZIMMERMAN junked his talk on Hushmail 2.0 in favour of a crowd-pleasing ramble on the history of PGP 2.0 (Half of all the e-mail he gets about backdoors in PGP are from Germans, who apparently adopt a "sort of quiet tone - it's okay, you can tell me if it's backdoored, I won't tell anyone".) Most unsurprising comment by PRZ: "For some reason, cryptography attracts paranoid people"... again, unconnected: FREESWAN's HUGH DANIELS gave three speeches, characteristically bitching about the nature of the universe in all of them ... Most European quote: "The best historical example [of the reaction to deCSS] is the churches response to printing presses" ... Returning nearer home (but not there yet), HAVENCO's RYAN LACKEY revealed Sealand's best-kept secret: the data haven is making a small profit, and he doesn't have a Sealand passport... Finally British DNSCon organiser JONATHAN WIGNALL gave a practical demo of a worm, including suggesting the best place to release duch a beast would be at a place with a few thousand suspects. He then withdrew the idea, on realising that at HAL he'd still be the *prime* suspect. Such nervousness may have affected his aim in the final distribution of goodies: I haven't had my photos developed, concludes our correspondent, but with luck I should have a shot of him throwing the pen that hit me right in the mouth... FULL REPORT (WITH ALL THE JOKES LEFT IN) AT: http://www.ntk.net/2001/08/17/hal2001.html >> SMALL PRINT << Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent. Registered at the Post Office as "to be honest, kind of bored of being the world's Steve Ballmer indiscreet video repository - can we get back to being the UK's most sarcastic weekly tech newsletter instead?" http://www.penismightier.com/main.php?start=1601&show=1 NEED TO KNOW THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK. Archive - http://www.ntk.net/ Unsubscribe? Mail ntknow-unsubscribe@lists.ntk.net Subscribe? Mail ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net NTK now is supported by UNFORTU.NET, and by you: http://www.geekstyle.co.uk/ (K) 2001 Special Projects. Copying is fine, but include URL: http://www.ntk.net/ Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com All communication is for publication, unless you beg. Press releases from naive PR people to pr@spesh.com Remember: Your work email may be monitored if sending sensitive material. Sending >500KB attachments is forbidden by the Geneva Convention. Your country may be at risk if you fail to comply.