Need To Know 2001-07-06

archive

>> FUTURE ANTI-NEWS << predating the obvious Now that the US wings of SUN, ADOBE, and COMPAQ are copying our "all employees please go play in the road until further notice" efforts, I guess we'll have return to work next week. You know, to be different. Besides, the news is beginning to pile up: After the whole ORBS debacle, extreme vigilante netblocks like the splendidly pure http://www.rfc-ignorant.org/ are popping up - and yes, we certainly *do* intend to make assertions that these are the "shared killfiles" predicted by William Gibson in his "misunderstood" Idoru. Then we'll start bouncing all incoming mail. We've also heard some intriguing stories about BT's now desperate attempts to save cash, including closing down irc.bt.net and internally trashing their whole ADSL policy. But maybe should wait until they're replacing twisted copper pair with the Curly-Wurlys and actively strangling potential competitors' spouses before we report on them again. But most of all, we're *itching* to see what those *fierce* defenders of unsolicited commercial mail, the DIRECT MARKETING ASSOCIATION will say when they discover they've left their own membership mailing list publicly available on their Web server. With the e-mail addresses of some of Britain's most respected junkmailers, should anyone want to get in touch with them for some reason we couldn't possibly imagine. http://www.upside.com/BigCaps_Weekly/3b44df2b1_yahoo.html - "it makes economic sense to shut down the factory" http://netsplit.de/networks/IRCnet/ - BT's just a blip anyway http://www.dma.org.uk/thedma/cgi-bin/ - DMA Code of Practice Rule 4.12: Personal information must always be held securely >> ANTI-NEWS << berating the obvious show 'em what it's like surfing through a text-to-speech converter: http://uk.news.yahoo.com/010705/80/bxe7g.html ... banner ads *so* inappropriate we suspect people are now faking them: http://www.ntk.net/2001/07/06/dohburn.gif ... offering "Commonsense in Computing" - though not in image compression, from the looks of things: http://www.comice.co.uk ... MOZILLA unveils handy new "public servant salary validator" plugin: http://www.ntk.net/2001/07/06/dohsalaries.gif ... "where the net works" (even if 800 of our employees don't any more): http://360networks.com/ ... jaded SLASHCODE has "seen it all before": http://www.ntk.net/2001/07/06/dohsd.gif ... what part of "suspended" don't you understand? http://www.utility.com/ ... http://www.number10.gov.uk/default.asp?PageId=3318 - "370 million consumers"? (3rd paragraph) How many passports is he planning on selling?... Shoplocal2u - dumb name, dumb prize: http://www.competitions-online.co.uk/new/2-Jul-2001.html ... Microsoft "guilty of ant-competitive behaviour" (I crush you like an INSECT!) http://www.theinquirer.net/28060115.htm ... "Crispy Vegetarian Aborigines" - taking "bush tucker" too far: http://www.ctjorganic.co.uk/buffetmenu.htm ... the search for truth #2: http://www.google.com/search?q=tv+licensing ... did she DIE in vain? http://www.ntk.net/2001/07/06/dohdando.gif ... >> EVENT QUEUE << goto's considered non-harmful Slightly earlier than usual DEFCON this year (from Fri 2001- 07-13, Las Vegas), though of course you might be saving the airfare for slightly-closer-to-home outdoor-geekfest HACKERS AT LARGE (from 2001-08-12, University of Twente, Amsterdam), whose recent call for participation describes the central conference topics as biometrics, digital rights, weird science, security & privacy, and "closing the gap" (the global casualwear store must be more unpopular than we thought). Also attempting to put a name to your pain is the evidently less cool EXPLORING CYBER SOCIETY II: DISSENT AND DEVIANCE IN THE INFORMATION AGE (from Mon, 2001-07-09, University of Northumbria, registration info unavailable), being the adventures of a cross-disciplinary band of academics whose interests include "computer hacking; the sending of logic bombs and viruses; denial of service attacks; circulation of criminal and obscene material; [...] organised criminality [and] legitimate popular protest" (hey, whose don't?). Somehow we suspect a similar crowd (though possibly fewer Linux t-shirts) when STEWART LEE reads from his new novel, "The Perfect Fool", at peculiarly-themed pub Filthy McNasty's (68 Amwell St, London EC1, 8.30pm, Wed 2001-07-11); "It is not known if Mr McNasty himself will be present," Lee deadpans, "or if he is a marketing tool like Mr McDonald." http://www.defcon.org/ - http://www.london2600.org.uk/ tonight, of course http://www.unn.ac.uk/corporate/cybersociety/ - let no dissent remain uncommodified! http://www.hal2001.org/hal/03Topics/07CFP/index.html - "not a LAN party" (but could be the next best thing) >> MEMEPOOL << oogle that google not sure if taking the piss out of compensation lawyers is the smartest move: http://www.ambulance-chasers.co.uk ... http://tv.cream.org/buchan/ ... the ur-origami joke explained: http://www.technicolor.org/origami/ball.html ... the fucking inevitable BIG BROTHER BRIAN MP3 link: http://www.diffusiononline.net ... president of newly triumphant Screen Actors Guild played soothing, persuasive voice of KITT in "Knight Rider" ... doctoral thesis hiscore table: http://cmc.uib.no/gamestudies/ ... still some of those automatic NATHAN text generators loose, we see: http://www.folkdevil.com/psy7.htm ... not technically *emulation* : http://madrigal.retrogames.com/dnload.html DAVE WINER naked on a cold day! Dave Winer naked on a cold day! http://www.justin.org/share/speak/reboot/2001/pix/boyssauna.lg.jpg ... sex-slave to BOB HOPE *and* HENRY KISSINGER? http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0966891627/ ... http://www.buggyballs.com/ vs http://www.buttcandle.com/ ... Is Mr Wall there? Is Mrs Wall there? Oh, they are? http://www.geocities.com/berlinwall_se/ ... Or is it perhaps a trademark for Microsoft's Mind Control device - http://www.computerandvideogames.com/story.cfm?sid=2985 >> GEEK MEDIA << the less rude www.tvgohome.com TV>> the LOCK, STOCK "and a fist full of Jack and Jills" episode (11.40pm, Fri, C4) is tastefully scheduled at the height of the hyperthermic Ecstasy-death season... only four made-for-TV domestic abuse dramas this weekend, with MOTHER MAY I SLEEP WITH DANGER? (9pm, Fri, C5), EYE FOR AN EYE (11.15pm, Fri, BBC1), DEATH WISH V (10pm, Sat, C5), and the reassuringly titled NO ONE COULD PROTECT HER (10.55pm, Sun, BBC1)... but overall a good week for low-budget '90s scifi, in the form of A TOWN HAS TURNED TO DUST (12.55am, Fri, BBC1), ISLAND CITY (1.05am, Tue, ITV), BABYLON 5: IN THE BEGINNING (12.15pm, Wed, C4), BABYLON 5: THIRDSPACE (12.15pm, Thu, C4), plus Elizabeth "Big" Perkins having more weird kid problems in CLONED (9pm, Wed, C5)... Emma Thompson, who played a lesbian in "Ellen", plays Hillary in arch Travolta Clinton satire PRIMARY COLORS (9pm, Sat, BBC1)... Anthony Hopkins battles a Baldwin and a bear in dullish outdoor romp THE EDGE (10.20pm, Sat, ITV)... the Radio Times believes that EQUINOX's look at lab rodents (9pm, Sun, C4) will, due to "genetic similarities" with humans, explore the dangers of accidentally creating sentient mice... followed by Sharon Stone/ Russell Crowe/ Sam Raimi designer Western THE QUICK AND THE DEAD (10pm, Sun, C4), last shown April 2000... spot the scenes mercilessly ripped off by "Evolution" in edited-for-language? GHOSTBUSTERS (5.05pm, Sun, C5) - last shown around New Year as far as we can remember - launching a "Fantasy Hero Night" which continues with LARA CROFT: LETHAL AND LOADED (8pm, Sun, C5) - also the imaginative subject of THAT THING (9.50pm, Wed, BBC2) - followed by two textbook terrible comic adaptations, Burton's BATMAN (9pm) and Lundgren as THE PUNISHER (11.30pm) ... and, just before "Springtime For Hitler" Brooks classic THE PRODUCERS (11.20pm, Mon, BBC1), Ruby Wax wheels out that tired "pretending to be rude and direct" schtick for Hugh Hefner in HOT WAX (10.35pm, Mon, BBC1) - ok, so how about "When Ruby Wax Met Louis Theroux And Jon Ronson"?... FILM>> fans will presumably be overjoyed with this all-too accurate adaptation of the ponderously pointless Playstation platformer, as Jolie largely fails to extend Lara Croft's dramatic repertoire of jumping, running (while firing two Desert Eagles), somersaulting, making vaguely sexual yelping noises, and not conveying any convincing emotion except the occasional sneer in TOMB RAIDER (imdb: adventuress/ based-on- video-game/ helicopter/ katana-sword/ buxom/ illuminati/ planetary-alignment/ remake/ clock/ death/ father/ girl-power- role/ gun/ orrery/ product-placement/ race-against-time/ time- travel/ tomb/ archeologist/ archeology/ cambodia/ robot/ time- reversal/ time)... or Helen Hunt gets caught in the rain (again), Farrah Fawcett dances naked in a fountain, there's a lesbian kiss between Kate Hudson and Liv Tyler, and the rest of the cast - Shelley "Cheers" Long, Laura "Jurassic Park" Dern, a near-unrecognisable Janine "Northern Exposure" Turner - run around doing daft Dolly Parton impressions, as Robert Altman ignores years of previous A-Team continuity in mildly watchable misogyny farce DR T AND THE WOMEN (imdb: birth/ country-club/ dallas/ golf-pro/ hunting/ mall/ mental- breakdown/ nudity/ ob-gyn/ storm/ texas/ lesbian/ divorce/ wedding/ lesbian-scene/ doctor/ father-daughter-relationship/ golf/ gynecologist/ godiva/ hestia-complex/ menopause/ twister/ dallas-texas). Though surely they'd have got more press if Richard Gere had played (say) a rectal foreign-object removal expert instead of a gynaecologist... >> SMALL PRINT << Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent. Registered at the Post Office as "...CHERUBIC?" http://www.net-media.co.uk/awards/ NEED TO KNOW THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK. Archive - http://www.ntk.net/ Unsubscribe? Mail ntknow-unsubscribe@lists.ntk.net Subscribe? Mail ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net NTK is supported by UNFORTU.NET, and by you: http://www.ntkmart.com/ (K) 2001 Special Projects. Copying is fine, but include URL: http://www.ntk.net/ Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com All communication is for publication, unless you beg. Press releases from naive PR people to pr@spesh.com Remember: Your work email may be monitored if sending sensitive material. Sending >500KB attachments is forbidden by the Geneva Convention. Your country may be at risk if you fail to comply.