Need To Know 2001-03-23

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"We used the roman numeral because we thought it would be cool and fun," he said. "But officially it's Mac OS X 10.0," Schiller said. http://www.zdnet.com/zdnn/stories/news/0,4586,2694399,00.html - and the bouncy applications in the dock? was that "cool"? WAS IT? >> HARD NEWS << abuse to reuse The sky is falling, the sky is falling! A recession so deep, God had to hire out-of-work Russians to enact the omens. That said, we *like* recessions: cheap Ataris one cycle, hours spent on the dole writing zines the next - and always lashings of rich, creamy schaudenfreude. Our hobby this L-shaped curve: watching previously money-grubbing corporates become *desperately* money-grubbing. Take the IP spat that everyone's missed this week. In a determined attempt to kill the one new sector that looks vaguely promising, PROXIM abruptly began suing all other manufacturers of 802.11b wireless LAN cards this week, for breaches of their patents. Why now? Well, last week, Intel dumped support for Proxim's competing HomeRF standard, and switched to the competing IEEE 802.11 standard. Proxim's shares drop 40%,. Of course, Proxim, like any IEEE contributor, made a solemn promise to be reasonable about patent licensing back when they were contributing to the standard. But, hey, they're running a business here. Or the possibility occurs that they might not be for much longer. http://news.excite.com/news/r/010321/16/tech-proxim-stocks - cause? http://www.proxim.com/inside/pressroom/2001pr/patent2.shtml - effect? http://standards.ieee.org/db/patents/pat802_11.html - everybody: bundle! Perhaps the biggest promise of change in the Long Gloom, for us, is that we'll waving goodbye to those itinerant leeches who, having joined us from their puckered-up worlds of advertising and media, are now slithering off to find freshly opened veins. Why, just this week we've had FUTURE NETWORKS^W PUBLISHING decide that they'd even go back to selling mags than be the wired(tm)-up Business 2.0 portal o' the Net. We've had anonymous reports of bold TV producers who "made the leap to the 21st century" recoil back into the tellywomb - unaware that even in that stagnant world, some things have changed (such as one ex-MD, now embedded in the BBC, pitching a 70's-style "hanggliding troubleshooter" show, with himself as the star). And can we suggest that if it's money they're after (and it always was), maybe they should all follow NTK irregular subscriber HARI KUNZRU's star, who safely quit new media when he was ahead, ie almost immediately, and now has an 800,000UKP two-book deal. Yeah, book publishing - that's where the money is, kids. Over there. Far away from us. But where we can see you. http://www.inside.com/jcs/Story?article_id=26278&pod_id=7 - back to the Future http://www.bunderlife.com/ - you've always been value for money, Leslie http://www.heise.de/tp/english/inhalt/co/8221/1.html - "and no-one ... wants to lose" http://www.ecst.csuchico.edu/~atman/attention-fat-bastards.html - still the best predictor of future growth we've seen In what we're sure isn't some ingenious attempt to get publicity-hungry hackers to provide lawcourt-ready evidence of their exploits, THE SCIENCE MUSEUM'S WELLCOME WING (the new bit, with all the PCs in the perspex boxes) is putting together an exhibition on the theme of Cybercrime And Hacking - and this could be your big chance to get your face in there along with Charlie Babbage and the CyberWorld 3D Imax movie. So far they've social-engineered London 2600 into asking if anyone has any "suitable photos" (or URLs) - if so, please mail them to london2600@hushmail.com , who promise to pass them on, or censor them (or both). "Privacy will be respected" they add, though bear in mind this was part of a conversation which also alluded to notable "script kiddy vulnerabilities" on "at least one" of the Science Museum's servers. http://www.sciencemuseum.org.uk/wellcome-wing/ - Kev Warwick's homepage susceptible to a bit of "remote control", too >> ANTI-NEWS << berating the obvious MANICS return to "Country & Western" roots (track listing): http://www.nme.com/NME/External/Reviews/Reviews_Story/0,1069,7192,00.html ... "not currently hiring" - oh, really? http://argus-inc.com/ , http://www.geocast.com/ , http://www.geocast.com/jobs/ ... http://groups.google.com/groups?q=x&seld=923311257&ic=1 - not so fast, BOB DIAMOND: http://www.xanboo.com/aboutus/management.htm ... REGISTER rails against SLASHDOT's censoring of Scientology tract, oddly reticent to run said feature themselves ... pass it on: http://www.theregister.co.uk/content/6/17817.html vs http://www.gameloft.co.uk/index2.php?file=free_210301 ... Tom and Barbara hold mass livestock cull as Foot & Mouth hits THE GOOD LIFE: http://www.ntk.net/2001/03/23/goodlifedoh.gif ... great ad for MS SQL SERVER 2000: http://www.terraserver.com vs http://www.terraserver.com/terra_whatis.asp ... PALMPILOT HOLLYWOOD: http://www.landware.com/gotype/version_history.html ... HEAR'SAY MILLENNIUM EDITION supersedes "Candle In The Win 98": http://www.ntk.net/2001/03/23/dohcandle.gif ... thanks IAIN, that ought to do it: http://www.ntk.net/2001/03/23/dohmtv.gif ... forget "new economy" here's the "oldBusiness" round-up: http://www.ntk.net/2001/03/23/dohold.gif ... "Some sites collect information on you and sell it to other businesses!" - http://www.citv.co.uk/citv/safesurfing/safesurfing.asp vs no 9 at: http://www.citv.co.uk/citv/bottom_nav/disclaimer.htm ... >> EVENT QUEUE << goto's considered non-harmful Tragically we didn't get the "women's sizes" NTK T-shirts printed in time for Mother's Day (maybe next year, eh?) but, filling the gap left by "Phone In Sick" day (though at the weekend), comes the first annual worldwide JAMMY DAY (from sundown Sat 2000-03-24 until sundown 2000-03-24) - an attempt to make you appreciate your family and friends by staying indoors all day in your pyjamas (individuals who sleep naked or in more exotic lingerie are presumably excluded). Other than that, not too much to look forward to until next week's CODE: INTERNATIONAL CONFERENCE ON COLLABORATION AND OWNERSHIP IN THE DIGITAL ECONOMY (from Tue 2001-04-03, various venues in Cambridge and London) which we suspect may be just a fancy way of saying "giant warez-swapmeet and demo party". http://www.cl.cam.ac.uk/CODE/ - Stallman! Perens! Free ice-cream! http://www.roughtrade.com/docs/rota.htm - and a slub.org generative music gig this Saturday afternoon http://www.jammyday.com/media/song.html - A "Million Slipper March"? Bloody Chris Morris fans... >> TRACKING << sufficiently advanced technology : the gathering Hey, we've all wasted time scribbling our ingenious "mindmapping" app on the backs of envelopes in pubs, but to our knowledge only Tony Buzan and SAINT TED NELSON of XANADU have made careers of it. And in Ted's case, not even that. Still, for anyone whose imagination was inspired, and attention deficit disorder accelerated, by Ted's vision of a super-mega-hyperlinked future, the appearence of GZIGZAG should get the synapses firing. Yup, it's an Java GUI implementation of Ted's long-awaited, heavily overcooked hypertext system, right down to *two* data windows, at least two sets of cursor keys, *six* different coloured cursors, and *n* dimensions of connectivity. The end result looks like what Spock must stare at in those goggles of his, and promises to solve all our data patterning needs. If we could just shake off this migraine... http://www.gzigzag.org/ - or apt-get install gzigzag , you debian wunderkinder! >> MEMEPOOL << hasta la altavista of course, MIR's slightly more "within our reach" nowadays: http://www.mirstation.com/station_future.html - no free TACOS: http://www.tacobell.com/3company/2business/mir.htm , but did they manage to "hold" the nightmarish QUATERMASS GUACAMOLE? http://www.space.com/news/spacestation/space_fungus_000727.html ... CD-burning Apple TV ad looks like GEISS for WINAMP... the new bonsaikitten.com: http://www.thewax.com/t-bone/sra3/ ... because you always wanted *your* school orchestra to tackle that classic medley of BUBBLE BOBBLE and NEW ZEALAND STORY : http://www.retrogames.com/music/Bandle%20Bobble-Live.mp3 ... http://playground.sun.com/1275/home.html#OFDescription - the future of non-corporate anthems... that KPMG song as a NOKIA RINGTONE: http://www.ntk.net/2001/03/23/kpmgsong.ott ... http://www.microsoft.com/net/hailstorm.asp#005 announces myAddress, myProfile, myContacts, myDevices, myWallet, myApplicationSettings, myPants etc - inexplicably overlooks: http://www.iamlost.com/features/mlp/ ... the SWEDISH SEARCH: http://www.google.com/advanced_search?hl=xx-bork ... VINT CERF owns hat with "artificial pony tail"... >> GEEK MEDIA << the less rude www.tvgohome.com TV>> it's Will Smith night on BBC2, with a double FRESH PRINCE OF BEL AIR (6.45pm, Fri, BBC2) leading into gay conman play adaptation SIX DEGREES OF SEPARATION (12.20am, Fri, BBC2) - Donald Sutherland's problems with convincing imposters continue in the superb 1970s remake of INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS (12midnight, Mon, BBC1) - squEEEEEEE!!!... Derek Jacobi imitates Jean-Luc Picard in a sci-fi convention special of FRASIER (10pm, Fri, C4)... unable to comprehend the end of its lucrative I LOVE THE 1980s franchise (9.10pm, Sat, BBC2), the BBC tosses in era classics FLASHDANCE (11.05pm, Fri, BBC1) and STAYING ALIVE (12.40am, Fri, BBC1)... and C5 pretty much gives up on Fri altogether, by showing Joan Collins' THE BITCH (10.50pm, Fri, C5), notorious turkey ISHTAR (12.30am, Fri, C5) plus the pilot episode of the Bullock-free TV series of THE NET (3.10am, Sat, C5)... the movie disappointments persist with Sigourney Weaver webcam whodunnit COPYCAT (10.25pm, Sat, BBC1), appalling Anne Rice yawn INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE (11.15pm, Sat, ITV), patchily entertaining THE CABLE GUY (10pm, Sun, C4) and, ingeniously following last week's "The Exorcist" and "Exorcist III", sub-standard Leslie Nielsen spoof REPOSSESSED (10pm, Mon, C4)... THE OTHER SIDE (3.05am, Sun, C4) opens a window on the poorly-ventilated world of self-assembly plastic-model "Girl Kits"... MTV presents a "making of" introduction to Johnny Knoxville's post-Tom-Green JACKASS (from 9pm, Mon, MTV) - hope it's the one with the taser: http://www.dailyping.com/archive/2000/10/30/ ... an underperforming THE WEST WING is ignominiously shunted back to 11.05pm, Thu, C4... "Why don't you just switch off your TV set and do something less - no, not *straight away*!" argues some guy on COUNTERBLAST (11.20pm, Thu, BBC2)... and C5 at last breaks its unblemished bad-movie record - TANGO AND CASH (9pm, Tue, C5), for instance - with GET CARTER (10pm, Wed, C5) and John Woo's underrated helicopter-exploding nuke spectacular BROKEN ARROW (9pm, Thu, C5)... FILM>> a re-teaming with Benjamin "Demolition Man" Bratt - plus William Shatner and Ernie "Ghostbusters" Hudson - marks a new entry in our Top 3 Geeky Sandra Bullock Movies Of All Time: sassy post-feminist nerd-makeover MISS CONGENIALITY (http://www.screenit.com/movies/2000/miss_congeniality.html : Some kids might want to imitate [Bullock's] snorting laugh; [Bullock] comes walking out wearing an extremely tight and somewhat short, formfitting dress that clearly accentuates her breasts; Michael Caine [...] appears to be gay)... and we give another two (severed) thumbs-up to Beat "Johnny Mnemonic" Takeshi's arthouse African-American buddy Yakuza shoot-em-up remake of "Romeo Must Die", BROTHER (http://www.bbfc.co.uk/ : Contains coarse language, and strong horror and violence)... otherwise there's Matthew "WarGames" Broderick in domestic Oscar bait YOU CAN COUNT ON ME (imdb: independent-film / affair-with-boss / affair / automobile-accident / bank / brother-sister-relationship / father-figure / marriage- proposal / mother-son-relationship / orphan / pool-table / single-mother / small-town / uncle-nephew-relationship)... Barry "Sphere" Levinson's IRA comedy AN EVERLASTING PIECE (http://www.screenit.com/movies/2000/an_everlasting_piece.html : The camera briefly focuses on and then moves up [Anna Friel's] leg and part of her thigh)... or heavy-handed anti-TV social-comment actioner FIFTEEN MINUTES (imdb: Robert De "Meet The Parents" Niro, Ed "The Brothers McMullen" Burns, Kim "Sex And The City, Mannequin" Cattrall, Kelsey "Frasier" Grammer and Oleg "Ultimate Fighting Championships" Taktarov - together at last!)... "WHAT THE???" FEEBDACK>> "Most of the time I don't know what you're talking about, but I like the way you say it" writes PETER LAURIE, unwittingly echoing the sentiments of almost every NTK reader we've ever met. But, to your credit, you guys can give as good as you get, proved by this compilation of the most baffling mail we've received recently... spotting that we'd stuck "needtoknow" at the end of an Amazon URL in NTK 2001-02-16, JOHN SULLIVAN inquired: "Do you have a deal with them, or are you just trying to fill their logs with your name?" You know what, John, it's actually a bit of both - we have an http://www.amazon.co.uk/associates/ sort of deal with them (new bestseller update coming soon, by the way)... "I notice NTK has revived the art of spine lines, as found of magazines of yore", observed DANIEL BIDDLE. No we haven't, Daniel, what on earth are you talking about? Next!... after his gentle ribbing in NTK 2001-02-23, WILLIAM ROWE attempted to confirm that his gibberish-fuelled NINFOMANIA did indeed pass away last year, only to be replaced by a near-identical newsletter called "FEED", itself now "on hold until we can find some more kryptonite to power our mainframe. New shipment due next month. Until then we are cashing in our silicon chips to pay for all last year's bar bills by selling the internet back to the Americans". Whatever, William - but thanks for revealing what's been sapping your superhuman potential... and "Why not have a section on Geeks?" suggested VICKI CRONIN, apropos of, it seems, nothing in particular. Vicki, last we checked, the whole newsletter is about "Geeks". Is there any aspect of this experience you think we might be neglecting?... reassuringly, some readers are now choosing to bewilder us with images as well as text, led by MAX SUMMERELL's T-shirt entry: http://www.ntk.net/2001/03/23/MAP0000.gif . As well as gaining our instant attention with a 2-megabyte 24-bit-colour uncompressed BMP, Max thoughtfully provided hints on other clothes to wear with the designs, in the most impressively hand-crafted submission we've received so far. Just one thing though: the design basically consists of the words "Green Orange Yellow" (and "Red Blue Black" for girls)?... and finally, thanks to all the obfuscation enthusiasts who interpreted 2001-03-02's mention of "Unlambda" as an open invitation to send us lengthy war stories of their minimalist coding exploits - including TONY FINCH, whose IOCCC winning http://www.ioccc.org/years.html#1998_fanf "used conventional FP bracketing to denote function application", and MARTIN RODGERS, who recommended "Scheme, running in your browser" http://www.cs.cornell.edu/eli/meaning.html and still "loves" the sieve of Erastothenes "written in one line of Haskell", concluding "And *still* nobody will employ me". NTK regrets that this set of correspondence is now closed... >> SMALL PRINT << Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent. Registered at the Post Office as not quite the reciprocal link we had in mind http://www.schmews.com/ NEED TO KNOW THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK. Archive - http://www.ntk.net/ Unsubscribe? Mail ntknow-unsubscribe@lists.ntk.net Subscribe? Mail ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net NTK now is supported by UNFORTU.NET, and by you: http://www.ntkmart.com/ (K) 2001 Special Projects. Copying is fine, but include URL: http://www.ntk.net/ Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com All communication is for publication, unless you beg. Press releases from naive PR people to pr@spesh.com Remember: Your work email may be monitored if sending sensitive material. Sending >500KB attachments is forbidden by the Geneva Convention. Your country may be at risk if you fail to comply.