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        "We will firewall Napster at source - we will block it at your 
         cable company, we will block it at your phone company, we will 
         block it at your [Internet-service provider]. We will firewall 
         it at your PC." 
          - "We will never surrender", promises SONY PICTURES Senior VP
                   ( http://www.uwiretoday.com/computing081700001.html )
        ...those PS2 "Trojan Horse" claims more worrying than we thought


                                >> HARD NEWS <<
                                 open to abuse

         While roughly similar in actual physical dimensions, the real 
         difference with a Mini-NTK is that we don't put as much effort 
         into checking if the stories are actually true or not. So, for 
         instance, wouldn't it be funny if BBC ONLINE really was "about 
         to sign a deal" (as our source believes) for a customised 
         version of the amusingly named ICQ-based chat/warez client 
         POST-@ ? Post-@'s site promises "Expected" compatibility with 
         AOL, Yahoo and MSN IM networks (and we know how keen they all 
         are on that), plus a "Find files" facility that lets you 
         "Search for files that other users have made public" - 
         typically, your pre-existing "My Music" directory. After all, 
         BBC radio has long pioneered its own CD-"sharing" protocol 
         (permitting listeners to record streaming FM audio, often 
         encouraging them to "request" specific tracks from a central 
         server) - the last thing they want are upstarts like Napster 
         coming along and stealing that entire market.
         http://www.post-at.com/ 
         - they've both got a commitment to public service broadcasting
http://www.unmissableTV.com/tx/talkingtv/paper/article/1,6667,26457,00.html
             - cash that could have been spent on more UKP100 TV shows!
         
         Dotcoms? We remember when this were all .nets and .orgs as 
         far as the eye could see. Well, those imagined halcyon days 
         returned briefly this week when a faulty update from NSI 
         caused four of the net's root-servers to forget that .com ever 
         existed - again [NTK 2000-08-04, NTK 1997-07-18]. Looks like 
         the transition to gtld-servers.net isn't going quite as 
         smoothly as you might expect. So with all the bad publicity, 
         maybe now wouldn't be the best time to announce changes to the 
         whole damn system - or would it? NSI have just announced a 
         trial of a multilingual unicode-based domain system, hired 
         from root-zone "competitors" i-DNS. What with all the ranting 
         ICANN conspiracies (or ICANN-spiracies, if you will) of the 
         post-Postel net, we've forgotten who we trust least.
         http://www.i-dns.net/newsroom/news/I-US000823-01.html.en
               - grab the amusing reverse encodings while you still can
         http://members.icann.org/nom.html
                 - low interest blamed on lack of ugly, drunken dwarves
         
         And what "slow news week" would be complete without another 
         exotic AMAZON loophole? Amazon.co.uk are currently selling the 
         top 5 CD singles for UKP1.99, which wouldn't be *that* 
         exciting, except that the delivery charge on 2 CDs is a mere 
         UKP1.77 + VAT (UKP2.08), bringing your grand total to UKP6.06. 
         Combine this with the fact that, thanks to the way they deal 
         with VAT, an Amazon UKP5 gift voucher [see NTKs 2000-06-23 & 
         30] is, apparently, worth UKP5.88 against anything which is 
         not a book (ie which includes VAT in its price), and you're 
         looking at 2 CD singles for just 9 pence each! As with the 
         previous "Wilbur Smith"-based scheme, the obvious flaw is the 
         assumption that you'd be prepared to spend 18p on (at time of 
         writing) two of: "Out Of Your Mind", "If This Ain't Love", 
         "Rock DJ", "Music" or "I Turn To You" - though, of course, you 
         can always send them to a friend, get another UKP5 voucher for 
         yourself, and repeat the whole process ad infinitum. 
         http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/tg/feature/-/67325/
            - hey, they haven't kicked us off their referral scheme yet


                                >> ANTI-NEWS <<
                             berating the obvious

         ALTAVISTA withdraws never-launched "free calls ISP", blames 
         exactly the same market conditions that existed 6 months ago: 
         http://www.foxglove.co.uk/terms_and_conditions.html ... 
         GUARDIAN 2000-08-21's "Bluff Your Way Through Any New Media 
         Conversation" guide contains curious references to "DoA 
         (Denial of Access)" attacks, "Out of the box (thinking): 
         analysts who need to get out more", and "The Need To Know 
         network, a groovily retro HTML site for insiders: www.ntk.com" 
         ... TIMES INTERFACE acquires a "debugged" Playstation 2 which, 
         bafflingly, uses Japanese convention of "O" for Yes, "X" for 
         No: http://www.the-times.co.uk/interface/insight/story802.html 
         ... "Based on feedback from British Airways, CONCORDE flight 
         dynamics at lower speeds have been enhanced" euphemises 
        http://www.microsoft.com/games/fs2000/downloads_fs2000update.asp
         ... DREAMCAST to hit UKP149 in Sep... estate agents strangely 
         aroused when you move pointer over "Enquiry Form" button: 
         http://www.pearsons.com ... STEVIE WONDER fans facing wait of 
         11 years: http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00004TA39/ 
         ... usual, perhaps excessive honesty from BIG BROTHER site: 
         http://www.bigbrother.terra.com/news/news_main_old.html ... 


                                >> TRACKING <<
               sufficiently advanced technology : the gathering

         Most of the publicity opportunities leading up to the launch 
         of KEVIN WARWICK's new book - "QI: The Quest For Intelligence" 
         - have now passed without incident, no doubt partly thanks to 
         community robotics monitoring group KEVIN WARWICK WATCH, who 
         remained at "full readiness" during the entire period. The 
         book itself can only be described as "reassuringly bonkers", 
         and spends most of its time recounting amazing feats of 
         intelligence from the animal kingdom, to demonstrate how it's 
         possible to be smart without being any good at IQ tests. In 
         which case, Warwick concludes, how do we know that robots 
         aren't already cleverer than us - just in ways that we don't 
         readily appreciate, with our all-too human biases favouring 
         (say) the ability to fend for yourself, to effectively 
         recognise a wide range of real-world objects, and/or move 
         unassisted across a variety of terrains? Nice big writing, 
         too, offering perhaps a hint of the professor's next target 
         audience: the larval geeks of THE ROYAL INSTITUTION CHRISTMAS 
         LECTURES (from 2000-12-14) which, with their usual emphasis on 
         practical demonstrations, will hopefully feature several 
         youngsters receiving live neuro-electrical implants, all the 
         better to receive his wordless instructions to "rise up" 
         against their fleshy human masters.
         http://www.kevinwarwick.org.uk/
                 - sorry, still processing the backlog of old sightings
         http://www.ri.ac.uk/Christmas/details2000.html
               - "Science fiction gives us ideas". No kidding, Kevin...


                                >> MEMEPOOL <<
                              hasta la altavista

         ELIZA software out-smarts AOL chat users (if you only read 
         one, read "five"): http://fury.com/aoliza/ ... elitism-free 
         NATHAN-only HOTMAIL clone http://131.111.234.28/~ro/faq/ 
         accidentally reveals "Society"-style hideous, extendable, 
         grasping arm: http://131.111.234.28/~ro/about/poster.html ... 
         nothing sacred any more - TVGOHOME guy diversifies into 
         symbiotic Radio Times parasite THE INNOVATIONS CATALOGUE: 
         http://www.zeppotron.com/unnovations/ (and asks "please stop 
         mailing me http://www.trollied.com/scooter.jpg ")... DANCING 
         STAGE makes kids imitate Carlton from Fresh Prince Of Bel Air: 
        http://www.ddrfreak.com/videos/Mel_B_-_Put_Your_Faith_in_Me.mpeg 
         ... MS gives over-literal answer to "What's your handicap?": 
  http://www.microsoft.com/presspass/features/2000/aug00/08-18gamers.asp
         ... famed POWER OF GRAYSKULL hasn't faded as much you'd expect: 
         http://www.he-man.org/fun_stuff/grayskull_tour/ ... GOD vs OPEN 
         SOURCE: http://www.thedailybread.net/users/cudi/main.html ... 


                                >> GEEK MEDIA <<
                       the less sold-out www.tvgohome.com

         TV>> the BBC begins its Bank Holiday bonanza with Rik Mayall, 
         Jane "Tesco Ad" Horrocks and Danny Aiello - together at last! 
         - in the notoriously poor BRING ME THE HEAD OF MAVIS DAVIS 
         (10.20pm, Fri, BBC1) - we'd rather they Televised Mayall's 
         Quad-Bike Head Injuries... C5 wheels out another of its "Sci-
         Fi Weekends", with Christopher "Nigel Tufnel" Guest's 
         misfiring remake ATTACK OF THE 50FT WOMAN (12.50am, Sat, C5), 
         and a Gerry Anderson-a-thon incorporating old SPACE: 1999 
         (12.40pm, Sun), JOE 90 (1.40pm, Sun), and STINGRAY (4.50pm, 
         Sun)... up against, presumably, the "You're about to see some 
         serious *stuff*" version of the first BACK TO THE FUTURE (1pm, 
         Sun, BBC1) film, plus a bumper bunch of overrated sci-fi 
         spoofs: THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW (9.55pm, Sat, BBC2), 
         David Cronenberg's SHIVERS: THE PARASITE MURDERS (11.30pm, 
         Sat, BBC2), and Duran Duran-inspiring '60s soft-porn yawn 
         BARBARELLA (11.55pm, Mon, BBC1)... bracketing these treats are 
         a deja-vu-ish batch of semi-recent repeats, including Carrie-
         Anne "The Matrix" Moss shoot-em-up SABOTAGE (9pm, Sat, C5), 
         last shown September 1999; Christopher "Back To The Future" 
         Lloyd's summer-camp comedy CAMP NOWHERE (10.35pm, Tue, ITV), 
         last shown December 1997; comedy-free "Groundhog Day"-alike 
         12:01 (1.45pm, Tue, C4), last shown August 1998; and HORIZON's 
         "New Asteroid Danger" (9pm, Tue, BBC2) - well, maybe it was 
         "New" when it was last shown in March 1999... genuine 
         novelties include Heinz Wolff applying a little Germanic 
         scientific rigour to his reports from the NOTTING HILL 
         CARNIVAL (11.20pm, Mon, BBC2)... plus, inexplicably, a double 
         tribute to CHARLES BRONSON: BRITAIN'S MOST DANGEROUS PRISONER 
         (9pm, Thu, C4), and the rather less judgemental CHARLES 
         BRONSON: BRITAIN'S HARDEST MAN (10.55pm, Tue, C5)... 
         
         FILM>> "not a particularly good Jackie Chan film, but not a 
         bad Owen Wilson one" is the verdict on sub-Rush-Hour kung-fu 
         comedy Western SHANGHAI NOON (http://www.capalert.com : 
         urination in public; two men in bath tubs; sex "kittens"; 
         pictograph of animal intercourse) - oddly, it doesn't feature 
         the really big train explosion that's in the trailer, though 
         there's a hint of the BBFC relaxing their famed anti-nunchuks 
         stance http://www.dvd-debate.com/Archive/april3.shtml#17.04 
         ... otherwise it's "battle of the post-modern teen slashers" 
         with Joshua "Dawson's Creek" Jackson's bad-meme-rising GOSSIP 
         (http://www.screenit.com : NORMAN REEDUS plays their other 
         roommate, a multimedia artist who similarly goes along with 
         the gossip plan, smokes, and drinks to the point of passing 
         out)... and an intriguing reversal of Joe-Bob Briggs' 
         "everyone who has sex must die" rule in the virgin-murdering 
         CHERRY FALLS (imdb trivia: cuts include graphic sexual 
         activity during the climactic orgy sequence and the death of a 
         character named Annette - supposedly the longest in horror 
         movie history)... and no killings - though you may find 
         yourself wishing for some - in Robert Carlyle/ Ray Winstone/ 
         Gina "Brass Eye" McKee's kids' footie fantasy THERE'S ONLY ONE 
         JIMMY GRIMBLE (http://www.bbfc.co.uk/ : passed '12' for 
         moderate violence and sex references)... 


                               >> SMALL PRINT <<

       Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
         happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
       on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
     nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
                       Registered at the Post Office as
      "the bar in Blackpool that looks like a Photoshop fake, but isn't"
                    http://www.ntk.net/2000/08/25/bar.html
                 
                                 NEED TO KNOW
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