_   _ _____ _  __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the uk>
| \ | |_   _| |/ / _ __   __2002-04-19_ o join! mail an empty message to
|  \| | | | | ' / | '_ \ / _ \ \ /\ / / o ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net
| |\  | | | | . \ | | | | (_) \ v  v /  o website (+ archive) lives at:
|_| \_| |_| |_|\_\|_| |_|\___/ \_/\_/   o     http://www.ntk.net/


         "Europe's music companies need to do more to wean
         music-lovers away from a 'free-music mindset', according to
         an Internet research company."
         http://news.zdnet.co.uk/story/0,,t269-s2108751,00.html
- of course, if only oxygen breathers could be weaned away from their
         "free air mindset", we could charge them for that as well...


                                >> HARD NEWS <<
                                 pay per views

         Nice to see the Inland Revenue getting into this whole "open
         government" policy. But really, there's no need to be so
         subtle. If you truly want everyone to see the edits to your
         Budget press releases, there's no need to hide it by
         uploading Word files with the previous deleted revisions
         casually left in. After all, if you wanted everyone to know
         that the suspiciously Old Labour phrase "ensure the nation
         receives a fair share of the profits from the exploitation
         of the North Sea" was edited out by a Treasury civil servant
         at the last minute, and replaced with "the North Sea fiscal
         regime does not strike the right balance between promoting
         investment and taking an adequate share of revenue derived
         from a national resource", tell us outright! It's no fun
         ploughing through all the Treasury word files you left on
         the site, turning on the "Confirm Revisions" option, and
         spotting the Sir Humphrey fixes for ourselves, is it?
         http://www.inlandrevenue.gov.uk/budget2002/index.htm
                                       - well, perhaps it is for some
         http://www.inlandrevenue.gov.uk/budget2002/releases_doc.zip
             - check out revce1.doc and revce2.doc for such non-"fun"
         http://www.ntk.net/2002/04/19/treasurydoh.png
                                          - or just check it out here

         It's only when you see all the main combatants piled into
         the same room at the COMPUTERS FREEDOM AND PRIVACY
         CONFERENCE that you realise just how dirty the copyright
         wars have become. Itinerant EFF reps, ricocheting from LA's
         Copy Protection Technology Working Group, struggling with
         the culture-shock: blank-faced Hollywood apparatchiks
         plotting the downfall of open computing there, geeks
         open-mouthed with horror here. Pro-DMCAer Allan Adler of the
         Association of American Publishers inadvertedly spurring
         everyone on by declaiming that the audience had "no right to
         access copyrighted material" - even copyrighted material in
         their own homes. Some other IP stooge backtracking from the
         mob by stating that the US just *had* to introduce the DMCA
         because of "international treaties". (Well, that's odd: they
         tell us the neoDMCA proposals in the EC is there because the
         US did it first.) Phil Zimmermann, patient as ever, trying
         to break it to the media barons that the software industry
         *tried* this copy protection lark back in the Eighties and
         if it didn't work for Leisure Suit Larry, it won't work for
         "Blade II". John Perry Barlow, so shocked and upset he
         starts talking sense. And the more the CFPers confer, the
         more they seemed to realise that Hollywood is going for the
         hat-trick: taking away freedom, privacy *and* computers.
         Pretty impressive. But only if they manage it.
         http://www.cfp2002.org/
                                                     - spot the Brits
         http://www.eff.org/blogs/bpdg/
                                              - deep, deep, blogging

         Forced to relocate to a pub after an administrative mixup over
         the bank offices they'd been hoping to use, last Saturday's
         first public meeting of the UK's ASSOCIATION FOR FREE SOFTWARE
         offered something for everyone: beer, pizza, and an expertly
         crafted mix of practical decision-making and drunken shouting.
         As the name suggests, the group plan to support and promote
         Free Software (ie, GNU *and* Linux) to the likes of schools,
         voluntary organisations, business federations, local
         government and the media - but that's "free" as in "freedom",
         not "free" as in "we currently think the membership fee will
         be UKP10 annually". And, just to liven things up at the end,
         the shouting came courtesy of a heated debate over software
         patents - not over whether they're a bad thing (they are,
         apparently), but over exactly how stringently the AFFS - and
         bemused pub locals - should oppose them, with (as ever)
         those who'd had the most recent contact with Richard Stallman
         feeling the uncontrollable urge to prove themselves more
         ideologically uncompromising than everyone else.
         http://www.affs.org.uk/
           - no, it's not supposed to stand for "Ah, for fuck's sake"
         http://mail.gnu.org/pipermail/fsfe-uk/2002-April/000916.html
         - vs http://mail.gnu.org/pipermail/fsfe-uk/2002-April/001013.html


                                >> ANTI-NEWS <<
                             berating the obvious

         INTERNET WORKS still getting most of its referrals from other
         Future mags: http://212.113.202.21/statsreports/iwks/all/ ...
         you say "nachos", but MS microwave oven prefers "nauseous":
         http://support.microsoft.com/default.aspx?scid=kb;EN-US;q161129
         ... not the only thing that's been "borrowed wholesale":
http://www.google.com/search?q=%22bridge+designs%22+%22borrowed+wholesale%22
         ... students' weekend runs from Fri-Thu, offer implies:
         http://www.thefilmworks.co.uk/tfw38/studentsfw/ ... recovering
         job market offers UKP25000-30000K (25m-30m) for engineer:
     http://www.gojobsite.co.uk/cgi-bin/vacdetails.pl?selection=910404048
         ... BBC stuntman bravely defies even Pythagoras' Theorem:
     http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/graphics/2002/04/19/nspider19big.jpg
         ... Ally McBeal or, to use her full name, the "Victoria and
         Albert Museum": http://www.ntk.net/2002/04/19/dohally.gif ...
         join the Royal Horticultural Society, get great discounts on
         live gig tickets: http://www.ntk.net/2002/04/19/dohrhs.gif ...
         alarmingly big condoms they're selling in Nigeria nowadays:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/world/americas/newsid_1925000/1925464.stm


                               >> EVENT QUEUE <<
                         goto's considered non-harmful

         It's all happening next Wednesday, with a three-way clash
         between this month's Silicon Beach Forum WIRELESS NETWORKS: A
         REVOLUTION ABOUT TO BEGIN? (Sussex Arts Club, Brighton, free),
         INFOSECURITY EUROPE (from Tue 2002-04-23, London Olympia, also
         free), and New Media Age's NEW MEDIA SHOW 2002 (Business
         Design Centre, London, no obvious pricing information visible
         on the website). But if you're not too exhausted after all
         that, NTK reader and Britain's most theoretically rigorous
         stand-up comedian STEWART LEE is holding a fundraising
         spectacular to save the Vortex Jazz Foundation (from 8pm, the
         Union Chapel, London N1, UKP12.50), with an all-star bill
         featuring Harry Hill, Johnny Vegas, John Hegley, Kevin "Simon
         Quinlank" Eldon and Jenny Eclair - though please note that
         Omid "The Mummy" Djalili appears on the leaflet but has had to
         pull out, hopefully not because of publicity commitments for
         "The Scorpion King".
         http://www.zoonies.com/cait/ohgoonthen/flyer.gif
              - not a penny wasted on fancy flyer design, you'll note
         http://www.silicon-beach.com/events.html
                             - war-driving workshops in pub next door
         http://www.infosec.co.uk/
                    - ah, those reassuringly unfashionable .cfm files
         http://www.newmediashow.co.uk/
                - "Paid-for content is a reality. (finally!)". Twats.


                                >> TRACKING <<
               sufficiently advanced technology : the gathering

         One day, some public-domain pauper publisher will release
         the edition of Nietsche's "Beyond Good And Evil", and on the
         cover will be a single, black fringed screenshot of W3M-IMG.
         This eldritch patch to the strange and powerful Japanese text-only
         browser W3M does a - thing - which, if God were alive, would
         strike him dead and all his morality. It is a text-only Web
         browser. It runs in an Xterm. It displays inline graphics.
         On an Xterm! In a text browser! JPEGs and GIFs and PNGs! So
         wrong! So beautiful! So ugly! So useful as a mutt mailcap
         setting! So *dirty*!
         http://packages.debian.org/unstable/text/w3m-img.html
- use alien or look for "w3m-img" in ports, Miss I'm-So-BSD-I-Compile-My-Socks
         http://www.ntk.net/2002/04/19/w3mbbc.png
      - submit wacky BBC images from the comfort of your term session


                                >> MEMEPOOL <<
                ceci n'est pas une http://www.gagpipe.com/

         the new 6 Degrees Of Kevin Bacon: http://covers.wiw.org/ ...
         the new "reviewing 9V batteries by tasting them with your
         tongue": http://www.eet.com/sys/uth/OEG20020326S0045 ... off
         the map this week - Aldermaston atomic weapons establishment:
www.multimap.com/map/photo.cgi?x=460000&y=164000&scale=50000&rt=overlay.htm
         ... now BOFH-free SALMON DAYS somewhat influenced by TVGoHome:
         http://www.salmondays.tv/column_2_jdl.html .... former Serb
         leader Radovan Karadzic threatens "Akts of mercy - SOON...":
         http://www.karadzic.org/rat/rat_akti_e.html ... who's scarier
         - the EDMONDS cult: http://rs.snoochdesigns.com/noel/ , the
         HONG KONG BIN LADEN and his "Brain voice read write machine"
         http://enaaaaa.cjb.net/ , or the FEDERAL FRAUD CONSPIRACY to
         sabotage the Matrix sequels?: http://qwer.org/fedfraud.html
         ... at 150p/min, let's hope they get the message pretty fast:
         http://www.lazystudent.co.uk/rejectline.html ... photos that
         didn't make the school prospectus this year for some reason:
         http://sova.lulea.org/ ...


                                >> GEEK MEDIA <<
                                  get out less

         TV>> we think that tonight is the Dorkbot episode of GAME-PAD
         (7.30pm, weekdays, Bravo) - another top co-production from
         Violet Berlin/Gareth Jones: http://www.whizzbang.tv/ ... in
         accordance with our suggestion of 2001-07-06, ALISTAIR
         MCGOWAN'S BIG IMPRESSION (8.30pm, Fri, BBC1) features "When
         Ruby Wax Met Louis Theroux" - but no Jon Ronson?... and Sarah
         Michelle Gellar is stranded on a desert island in BEVERLY
         HILLS FAMILY ROBINSON (5.15pm, Sat, C5), then the inevitable
         "The Matrix"-style episode of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (8pm,
         Thu, Sky1)... Al "Pub Landlord" Murray introduces TOP TEN TV
         BASTARDS (10.20pm, Sat, C4)... BBC2 continues trying to up the
         viewing figures with 3 more back-to-back repeats of 24 (11pm,
         Sat, BBC2) - can't wait till the series is over, then they can
         show them all "in real time" one day... and Charlton Heston
         once again finds it difficult to make friends of similar age-
         group and interests in post-biowar shootout THE OMEGA MAN
         (12.45am, Sat, C5) - customers who bought this video also
         bought "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone" on DVD:
www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/tg/stores/detail/similarities/-/video/B00004CNHQ/
         ... hopefully reprising that really good "Decisive Weapons"
         docu about the Falklands, ULTIMATE JUMP JETS (8pm, Sun, C5)
         profiles the Hawker Harrier... if C5's LIFE DOCTOR (8pm, Thu,
         C5) is such a frickin' expert, why doesn't she help people
         with real problems, like the Mad-Max-esque car-dwelling petrol
         scavengers of WASTED? (8.05pm, Sun, C4)... while Alicia
         "Cybill's daughter" Witt discovers you just can't trust a
         "friend of a friend" in URBAN LEGEND (10pm, Sun, C4)... Ricky
         "The Office" Gervais may win one of THE BAFTAS (8.30pm, Mon,
         ITV) at the same time as slagging off other comedians in ROOM
         101 (10pm, Mon, BBC2)... pedestrian Brit horror AN AMERICAN
         WEREWOLF IN LONDON (9pm, Mon, C5) segues handily into THE
         TRUTH ABOUT GAY ANIMALS (10.35pm, Mon, C4), followed by
         considerable Deborah Kara Unger nudity and disturbing subject
         matter in David Cronenberg's censorship cause celebre CRASH
         (11.35pm, Mon, C4)... join us, please, to say farewell to
         surely the last ever episode of ATTACHMENTS (10pm, Wed, BBC2):
         http://www.everyonehatesattachments.com/ ... and Jeffrey "Hank
         from The Larry Sanders Show" Tambor offers an alternative to
         Victor Lewis-Smith's jabbering commentary in the hilariously
         titled THE ANNUAL BARFTA AWARDS (11.05pm, Thu, C4)...

         FILM>> for the benefit of anyone who's ever wondered how it
         would look, Richard Linklater remakes the stoner conversations
         of "Slacker" as hi-res Flash animations in WAKING LIFE (imdb:
         independent-film/ dream/ surreal/ conversation/ philosophy)...
         equally authentic-looking CGIs paper over the acting cracks in
         The Rock/ Kelly "Martial Law" Hu grudge-match THE SCORPION
         KING ( http://www.bbfc.co.uk/ : The distributor sought and was
         given advice during post-production which resulted in the
         removal, prior to formal submission, of a headbutt delivered
         by the hero to the villain in a climactic fight sequence)...
         and it looks like Guy Pearce really has suffered a knock to
         the head as he follows top-notch noirs like "Memento" and "LA
         Confidential" with Kevin "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves"
         Reynolds' historic revenge nonsense THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO
         ( http://www.bbfc.co.uk/ : Distributor chose to remove two
         shots of a man hanging to avoid giving children the impression
         that a person can hang for some time with no ill effects and
         in order to achieve a PG classification)...


                               >> SMALL PRINT <<

       Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
         happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
       on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
     nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
                       Registered at the Post Office as
                             "still backing OS/2"
                  http://biz.yahoo.com/iw/020405/040325.html

                                 NEED TO KNOW
            THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK.
                         Archive - http://www.ntk.net/
              Unsubscribe? Mail ntknow-unsubscribe@lists.ntk.net
                Subscribe? Mail ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net
 NTK now is supported by UNFORTU.NET, and by you: http://www.geekstyle.co.uk/

                          (K) 2002 Special Projects.
             Copying is fine, but include URL: http://www.ntk.net/

                    Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com
             All communication is for publication, unless you beg.
              Press releases from naive PR people to pr@spesh.com
     Remember: Your work email may be monitored if sending sensitive material.
       Sending >500KB attachments is forbidden by the Geneva Convention.
              Your country may be at risk if you fail to comply.