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                              "It's an expectation, not a deadline."
    - Spokesman KATIE COTTON on Apple's "CEO by end of '97" promise
          "Bust by '99" - it's an expectation, Apple, not a deadline


                               >> HARD NEWS <<
                                   win/lose

         MICROSOFT responded to last week's court ruling (that they
         should unbundle Internet Explorer and Windows 95) with all
         the care and attention of their own technical support
         staff. First, they denied it was possible. Then they said,
         airily, that you *could* try and delete the Explorer files,
         but that would probably crash the OS: they really weren't
         sure. Finally, they grudgingly suggested formatting the
         hard disk and re-installing the original (Summer 1995)
         version of Win '95. Maybe that'll work, they said. Given
         Microsoft's clear intention to wind up the DOJ (and their
         superlative experience at doing that to everyone else), we
         were hoping for something a little more creative. Maybe
         they should deny that Windows '95 is an OS at all, but a
         "special sort of Internet Explorer for hard drives".
         Scarily, that's close to what MS seem to be saying about
         Windows '98: it and IE4.0, they say, are essentially the
         same thing. Which is interesting when you remember that
         Microsoft also promised that Explorer would be always be
         free. Wow! Free Windows! It's what we always wanted!
         www.yahoo.com/headlines/971218/tech/stories/browser_2.html
                   - well, we'd have preferred socks, but never mind

         Of course the point at which it'll get truly scary is when
         the DOJ announces a "strategic partnership agreement" with
         Gates to "develop and improve... the legislative process".
         This inevitably happens to any enemy of MICROSOFT,
         generally four months just before they disappear entirely.
         SGI's just announced such a deal over OpenGL++, or
         FAHRENHEIT, as the co-development is now called. Presumably
         the name is meant to convey the chilly reception SGI's die-
         hard fans gave it - or perhaps it's a hint to HP (who
         thought *they* were doing the 3D stuff for Microsoft) that
         they're now out in the cold. Or maybe it's just a reference
         to those OpenGL developers now burning their old manuals at
         451 degrees, and trying to learn the new order.
         http://www.sgi.com/ hold on, didn't we run this deal last week?
         http://www.apple.com/              or the time before that?
         http://www.ibm.com/                or the time before that?

         Bill Clinton - the US President, equivalent of the Queen in
         this country - signed the "NO ELECTRONIC THEFT ACT" this
         week. The new law closed the loophole that let Americans
         give away copies of copyrighted data even if they didn't
         make a profit out of it (refusing to profiteer is already a
         capital offence in most American states). Now the tricky
         part: enforcement. Latest copy protection to unravel: the
         Digital Watermarking system in PHOTOSHOP. Look out for
         un%ign, a cross-platform utility to remove those
         watermarks, including the "Adult picture" rating flags.
         Even more mischievous, cracker Frogs_Print's new Photoshop
         patch allows perps to replace the original copyright with
         their own, letting them sue those capitalists right back.
         http://www.digimarc.com/im_page.html
                                   - like the Titanic, "uncrackable"
 
         In the week's other news: an ESCAPED LION rampaged through
         Disneyworld - Florida tourists were warned it was "not an
         attraction"; a virulent Hong Kong contagion crossed the
         species barrier from CHICKENS to humans; NINTENDO denied
         responsibility for an anime show that triggered epileptic
         seizures in 600 Japanese children; and a METEOR blasted a
         15 megaton crater in the heart of Greenland. That's the
         nightmare futuristic news round-up with me, William Gibson.
         Next up: Bruce Sterling with the heavy weather.


                               >> ANTI-NEWS <<
                            imagine your surprise

         WIRED 6.01 is special "how lunatic are we?"
         retrospective... Chris Morris' BLUE JAM does Diana re-edit,
         is abruptly replaced with repeat... "Partners Show Little
         Sympathy For Microsoft" reveals NET INSIDER... COREL
         reports loss... XS4ALL in legal trouble... SLATE to charge
         subscriptions "next year" (bye, Slate)... APPLE stock at
         10-year low... RACING GAMES may encourage (nay, reward)
         dangerous driving, manufacturers admit... BRITISH BOFFINS
         discovered strong crypto before anyone else, did nothing
         with it ( www.cesg.gov.uk/cnellis.htm ) ... "Internet does
         not hold key to World peace", JON KATZ concedes... 87% of
         young people believe themselves "invulnerable to AIDS",
         study shows... SCOTLAND to encourage "Silicon Glen". Again.


                              >> EVENT QUEUE <<
                   where "time out" isn't an error message

         From the people who brought you something to read on a Friday
         afternoon if you've got nothing better to do (ie NTK, you
         dummy) comes something to do from 8pm this Saturday evening
         (20/12/97) - if you've got nothing better etc etc. Yes, you are
         *all* invited to the NTK XMAS "DON'T" at London Bridge-area
         people's cybercafe Backspace (free drink! and entertainment
         that costs only self-esteem!). RSVP to tips@spesh.com, and note
         that you do have to be a subscriber to attend, so make sure you
         know the email address that your NTK gets sent to. Your
         domain's not down, you're not coming in. Got that?
         http://www.backspace.org/clink - a new kind of entertainment...
         http://www.primenet.com/~kennyb/top.htm - ...a new kind of war

         "Freedom Of Information consultation process kept under
         wraps". What would Mr Rory Bremner and his satirical chums
         make of that? Well, the secret's out: UK Citizens Online
         Democracy (UKCOD) have set up a site (in loose co-operation
         with the govt) to collect submissions from the public on
         the new White Paper. It's only until 11/2/98 - which is
         why, technically, it's an event. Yeah, we know, but it's
         actually quite a smart site, with a lot of impartial data
         on the proposals, chats with the relevant officials, and a
         respectable mail/Web discussion forum. It'd be nice if the
         FOI Act didn't mess up completely, and judging by the DTI's
         similar set-up with their crypto proposals, these sites can
         at least serve as a source of acute embarrassment when they
         try to ignore the collected opinions. Which they will. Oh,
         what's the point?
         http://foi.democracy.org/ a more optimistic slant. For now.


                                >> TRACKING <<
                             if it moves, ftp it

         If you're (rightfully) disappointed by "teaser" trailers like
         the one for the X Files movie, then *why not render your own*?
         That's the self-reliant philosophy of the young Jedis at
         SKYSTATION, who've unofficially CGI'd and video-hacked both a
         20 meg tease and a 13 meg trail for STAR WARS EPISODE I,
         currently due for cinema release May 1999. Back on the "real"
         film, there are unconfirmed reports that Liam Neeson "stormed
         off" during his first lightsabre duel with Ewan McGregor, as
         the crew collapsed laughing. George Lucas walks over to
         McGregor, completely straight-faced. "Ewan", he says, "Don't
         make the noises."
         http://www.thex-files.com/video/xfmov70.mov
                        - exciting, yet disturbing, possibilities...
         http://theforce.net/Skystation/holoscrn.html
           - ...I mean, didn't this sort of thing lead to Babylon 5?

         A couple of updates to end the year with. There's a new
         version of mIRC, Khaled Mardam-Bey's irrepressible IRC
         client for Windows. It's worth upgrading, partly because
         it's always fun to install new software, partly because
         there's a host of new features (nick completion, find text
         in window, scripting extensions), and partly because there
         was a not inconsiderable security hole in the last one.
         http://www.mirc.co.uk/     no, we're not saying what it was
         http://www.irchelp.org/irchelp/mirc/si.html
                                       - okay, you talked us into it

         And ooh! A new Java Development Kit 1.2 beta! Drag and drop!
         Almost-working-Swing pluggable components! Vague control
         over the stupid garbage collector! A halfway-decent
         Collection class! Something to hack when you're hiding
         upstairs from the relatives! Doesn't run on any browsers
         yet! Who cares! It's cutting edge! Mmmm!
         http://java.sun.com/
            - the URL reads like a Class. Is that some kind of joke?


                                >> MEMEPOOL <<
                              hasta la altavista

         SHOOTBACK BART vs Explodroid... translating English->French
         on ALTAVISTA - then translating back... GEOCITIES IPO? ...
         "Vulnerabilities in ICQ"... Coolest checkbox ever - "make
         noise if new Mersenne prime found" - www.mersenne.org ...
         seasonal overclocking at www.kryotech.com ... BBC have just
         started casting THE INVISIBLES, reveals GRANT MORRISON...
         meanwhile NEAL GAIMAN reveals a NEVERWHERE film in the
         pipeline (where it belongs)... www.mafia.spb.ru ... Prince
         Nazeem vs Kevin Kelly?!... SONY to remake THUNDERBALL
         *again*, with Sean Connery, and ID4's Dean Devlin, Roland
         Emmerich... Free the ONE IN A MILLION two!...
         http://sero.org/Sero/game.html ... don't go here (really):
         www.euronet.nl/~highman/prison2.htm


                               >> CORRIGENDA <<
                                 goofing off

         We said that DEMON's nameserver had been hacked last week.
         We were wrong - it was, in fact, a customer of Demon,
         www.netalia.com. NTK regrets the error: guess someone must
         have been playing with *our* "name" servers! Ahahaha. Just
         our little joke. Go on Cliff, please laugh.


                               >> GEEK MEDIA <<
                           it's a wonderful no-life

         WIDE TV>> Linda "Sarah Connor" Hamilton guests in the last
         in this series of FRASIER (10pm, Fri, C4), though "He'll be
         back" - in two weeks... the only way we can describe LEXX:
         THE DARK ZONE STORIES (12.10am, Fri, C5) is - "like Dune
         remade by the people who did Space Precinct so as to
         resemble an unofficial sequel to Blake's 7" - but in a good
         way, of course... rivalling even previous bizarro theme
         nights, the evening devoted to the choices (and output) of
         cross-dressing comic EDDIE IZZARD (9pm, Sat, C4) includes
         Woody Allen's hit-and-miss sci-fi spoof SLEEPER (11.55pm,
         Sat, C4) and hopefully the cracking "best of" episode of
         KIDS IN THE HALL (11.10pm, Sat, C4)... Doug Trumbull's
         proto-Strange Days VR-thriller BRAINSTORM (11.45pm, Sat,
         BBC2) is actually far better than Strange Days but, then
         again, *what isn't*? - a theme intriguingly echoed by the
         CHARLIE BROWN AND SNOOPY SHOW (11.20am, Sun, BBC2) in which
         "the kids go to a computer camp where the games come to
         life" (Radio Times)... www.dianabear.com won't be appearing
         in the first of many docus wallowing in MEMORIES OF DIANA
         (6.30pm, Sun, BBC1)... it's hard to imagine the horror of
         being trapped on board Mir day after day after day - well,
         that is until you've heard "Brit-born" astronaut Michael
         Foale go on about it for an hour on EQUINOX (9pm, Mon,
         C4)... Phil Cornwell's impressions of ageing celebs on
         STELLA STREET (11.15pm, Mon-Tue, BBC2) should be tragically
         less funny than his Steve Wright show stuff... bunk off
         early for the cool sci-fi F/X compilation of MOVIE MAGIC:
         FINAL FRONTIER (3.10pm, Tue, ITV) - probably a big
         improvement on Harrison Ford yawn-athon CLEAR AND PRESENT
         DANGER (9.30pm, Tue, BBC1)... Xmas Eve taunts devotees of
         the Formulaic Film Titles Of Steven Spielberg, with RAIDERS
         OF THE LOST ARK (2.50pm, Wed, BBC1) vs CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF
         THE THIRD KIND (2.05pm, Wed, ITV)... Drebin is back (just
         accept it) in NAKED GUN 33 1/3 (9pm, Wed, BBC1), while
         MODERN TIMES (9pm, Wed, BBC2) plays with toys... on the big
         day itself, the MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL (3.10pm, ITV, Thu)
         and THE MASK (6.50pm, Thu, BBC1) are the best of the
         regular kiddie-crap (The Flintstones? Honey I Shrunk The
         Kids? Home Alone 2???)... and C4 continues its 15th-
         anniversary retrospective with A SPLICE OF LIFE (10.15pm,
         Thu, C4), featuring clips from seasonal Film On Four fare
         like Shallow Grave, The Crying Game, The Madness Of King
         George and - of course - Trainspotting...

         FILM>> GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE (imdb: comedy / jungle / based-
         on-cartoon / based-on-tv-series) is perhaps the least
         despicable of this week's child-oriented offerings, with
         Brendan "Encino Man" Fraser imitating the tree-slamming
         doofus originally devised by Jay Ward Productions - who
         also made Rocky And Bullwinkle, Tom Slick, Peabody's
         Improbable History, yet astonishingly *not* Roger Ramjet or
         Batfink... uh-oh: crypto-Arthurian romp PRINCE VALIANT
         (imdb: adventure / based-on-comic) is an UK/ Irish/ German
         co-production and features characters called "Pechet" and
         "Thagnar"... it's got four villains instead of two, and may
         yet be the best Home Alone movie ever made - but still take
         care stepping over the threshold of HOME ALONE 3 (MPAA
         rated: PG for "slapstick violence, language and mild
         sensuality" - whatever *that* means)... in other movie
         news, MEN OF CRISIS is a recently uncovered 1971 Woody
         Allen short that satirises the Nixon government - as Film
         Threat Weekly reports: "unlike his last 15 movies, the film
         DOES NOT feature a sub-plot about Allen involved in a May-
         September romance"...


                                 >> COMPO <<
           open the envelope - you may already have lost your job!
                         http://www.ntk.net/compo/

         It's the last week of our Christmas competition, and we're
         pleased to say that we finally shook off all those "another
         easy one, mate!" e-mails. Only one contestant sent us the
         correct URL for last week's clue. Unfortunately, he sent it
         as a reply to the 17/10/97 competition, and is therefore
         disqualified. The correct answer, was, of course,
         http://www.virgin.net/now.html - the "extra dot" being the
         one we slipped into our sponsor list at the bottom of the
         e-mail. Just goes to show how much attention people pay to
         banner ads, doesn't it?

         Anyway, here it is, your last chance to win fame and
         fortune. The URL is in the form www.**********.com/now.html
         and your starter for ten is:

                                 GNU homo art

         The full list of "hacked" URLs (and we use those quotes
         advisedly) will be announced at the .NOT Awards early next
         year, where we'll also be giving the prize for the best URL
         submitted (a bumper box of goodies and a free dinner date
         with the Scotland Yard's Computer Crime Unit). We might
         also give a sneak preview of the list at tomorrow's party:
         it depends how desperately we need to make friends. And,
         let's face it, we come across as pretty desperate, don't
         we?


                              >> SMALL PRINT <<

      Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
        happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
      on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
    nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
      It is registered at the Post Office as "worryingly well clued-in".

                                 NEED TO KNOW
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           (K) 1997 Special Projects. Non-business copying is fine,
                       but retain SMALL PRINT. Contact
               terry@spesh.com for commercial license details.

                   Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com.

                           >> even smaller print <<

           NTK will return on Sat 27/12/97 in a special double-issue
            (ie there probably won't be one the week after that).
                 Normal transmissions will resume on 9/1/98.

           In the meantime, have a very merry Newtonmas and a great
                                  New Year.