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         "It came as shock to learn that much of the system relies
         on volunteers."
             - Sally Tate, MD of Prince Plc, on the co-operative Net
                           and people *pay* you to be this ignorant?

 [On which note, apologies to anyone who received three times the
 Knowledge last weekend. We'd like to claim all the credit, but actually
 it was mostly down to a bunch of "professionals" radically
 misconfiguring their mailserver further down the line from us. We've put
 some safeguards in to stop it affecting the list in the future, but then
 again, we're volunteers: what do we know?]


                               >> HARD NEWS <<
                               continuing sagas

         The ONE IN A MILLION gamble that didn't come off: two kids,
         just out of college, who thought they were on to a money-
         spinner reselling domains like "spice-girls.net" and
         "marksandspencer.com". Instead, they got billed 60,000UKP
         legal costs this week, and banned from ever registering
         domains again. What future have they left? Can we suggest
         that they partner with some unscrupulous lawyers, and
         pursue a career in nailing all the big companies that the
         litigants conveniently ignored? Like RBR Group, perhaps, a
         computer hardware reseller who unaccountably owns
         scaryspice.co.uk? Or what about virginbrides.co.uk, owned
         by "Associated Computing Ltd" but hosted by NetBenefit -
         who also run virginet.co.uk (owned by the mysterious
         Virginet Ltd)... Then there's Bijoux Accessories'
         marksandspencers.co.uk and Megatronix' spice-girls.co.uk -
         the "unofficial home of the Spice Girls on the Web"? Or
         maybe even that irrepressible NetNames millionaire Ivan
         Pope, who probably thinks he got out of domain-squatting
         just in time, but still, we notice, has "nscape.com"?
         http://www.ntk.net/names/uknames.zip (1.8MB)
         - one week only! The complete "co.uk" list legal starter kit!

         Ongoing confusion at MSN, who last week said they were
         pulling out of content, and this week were said to be
         packing in the ISP business. That pretty much leaves them
         in charge of forwarding their customers' mail, so some
         backtracking was in order. To get this straight: MSN UK and
         US are "toning down" content, but still providing
         connectivity. MSN France and the rest of the world are
         pulling out of connectivity, not sure about content. In the
         meantime, MSN employees must be looking enviously to
         Redmond's cosying up to big-bandwidth providers, and
         thinking "why did we end up in this Web backwater"?
         http://www.msn.co.uk
                            - well, that goes for all of us, I guess

         Weird WIRED coincidences: one year ago, Wired Ventures,
         after two failed IPOs, manages to get private funding -
         presumably with strings attached. Six months later, after a
         flurry of restructuring, colourful Wired founder Louis
         Rossetto steps down as CEO; six months after *that* (this
         week), there's another restructuring, and Rossetto quits
         his publisher role too. Could it be that Wired Ventures
         isn't hitting some performance milestones, and that
         Rossetto's increasing distance from the centre of
         operations are part of that deal? Au contraire - "I gave
         myself a promotion", he told reporters at C|NET. Regarding
         all these scurrilous stories, he added "what part of 'no
         truth' do you not understand?". Tell you what Louis - we'll
         admit not understanding your "no" if you admit losing
         contact with "truth". Would that be fair?
         http://www.weird.co.uk/
               - other coincidences: we resume slagging off Wired...
         http://www.spesh.com/danny/wireduk/
            - days after they go to press with an NTK review. Spook!


                               >> ANTI-NEWS <<
                             berating the obvious

         PC GAMER gets exclusive Quake II review/coverdisk, after
         running cover stories on 2 other Activision releases (Heavy
         Gear, Dark Reign) earlier this year... BILL GATES "not
         buying home in Notting Hill"... Campaign's REVOLUT!ON not
         quite leaping off the newstands... "Schools Buying
         Computers, With No Assurance Of Payoff" reveals NEW YORK
         TIMES... EMAP give "Golden Joystick '97" awards to SUPER
         MARIO 64, QUAKE, LARA CROFT - and three of their own
         magazines... JANET stamping down on Quakeservers (they
         account for >10% of some unis' Net traffic)... PLAYBOY to
         launch CYBER BACHELOR PAD... BT "hamstrung by bureacracy",
         uncovers expert report... producers admit to "homosexual
         subtext" in XENA: WARRIOR PRINCESS... C4 will not be
         recommissioning SPACE CADETS, HERE'S JOHNNY, BRASS EYE...
         GUARDIAN reports software piracy in Russia at "an all-time
         low" - of 91%... 2000AD features Blair droid... GILBERT &
         GEORGE screensaver quite literally shit... non-tech workers
         resent geek salaries, observes WALL STREET JOURNAL...


                              >> EVENT QUEUE <<
                             for the LaserJet Set

         No big events this week (well, there's apparently some sort
         of Java thing at the weekend, but everyone says that'll be
         rubbish). Never mind: we have the perfect cheap date
         instead. Pop out with your loved one between 4.30pm and 8pm
         this weekend, and look up at the Moon. Surrounding it, you
         should be able to spot Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter and -
         with a telescope or strong pair of binoculars, Uranus and
         Neptune. If your partner hasn't got a Masters in
         Astrophysics, you could probably even make out you spotted
         Pluto. Tell him or her that the planets won't be lined up
         like this for another century. Then go quiet and sigh.
         You'll come across as deep, and will probably have saved at
         least a tenner on food and entertainment costs.
         http://www.cybersky.com/
         - Wintel planetarium simulator, sans "Pink Floyd" evenings
         http://www.lerc.nasa.gov/WWW/PAO/warp.htm
         - meanwhile, re: warp - NASA asks "are we nearly there yet?"



                                >> TRACKING <<
                               really? for me?

         There is a santy claus, after all - and his name is
         Carmack. The final production copy of QUAKE II went to gold
         on Monday, and is now being pressed ready for sale. CDs are
         expected to hit the UK on the 12th, but those who aren't
         afraid of premature spooge can peruse the online manual,
         which has sneaked its way onto the Id servers. Trivia to be
         gleaned: the Quake II theme song is by Rob Zombie (not, one
         suspects, the name he was christened with), while
         soundtrack is by Sonic Mayhem (who were asked that their
         work should have a "Doom" feel to it). Net play hasn't yet
         been tweaked for TCP/IP, although the much improved single-
         player mode should allow Id breathing space to release a
         suitably enhanced patch. Ah, who cares. Let the Yule
         giblets fly!
         http://satan.idsoftware.com/q2manual/
                              - there's life in that OpenGL clan yet

         Expect plenty of hoo-hah about I/O/D 4, the new piece by
         net.art veteran MATTHEW FULLER and Escape. Critics will be
         astounded to discover an artwork that actually does something,
         rather than just some fat Director file padded out with
         some school-of-ZX81 animation. But what *does* it do? Well,
         as far as we can see, I/O/D 4 represents a ingenious
         rediscovery of the concept of a net spider (exciting
         concept circa 1994) in the form of a (Director) program
         which grabs Web pages by repeatedly sucking up the HTML and
         then searching through the hyperlinks while drawing pretty
         patterns. The artists themselves believe this to be "an
         astoundingly good program", which is dangerous talk about
         something that a CS graduate could knock up in an evening.
         Of course, we're sure CS graduates wouldn't understand the
         deeper ramifications of the work.
         http://www.backspace.org/iod/
             - Nice interface though. We add, just as patronisingly.
         http://www.polbox.com/a/aris/scene.htm
           - *Real* astoundingly good programs. And better art, too.

         INTERNET EXPLORER 4.01 is out. Lots of extras for deaf or
         blind computer users (the only ones Microsoft believe
         haven't yet installed the original), some tweaks for those
         high publicity security flaws that no-one will ever
         exploit, and improved functionality for those who "may have
         experienced difficulties in installation". So this time
         "hyper" Active Desktop won't completely trash our system so
         we can't de-install? Oh, gimmee-gimmee.
         http://www.microsoft.com/ie/
               - where would you like to attempt to return to today?

         And meanwhile, on the beta front: you can see the future
         look of ICQ with C|Net's download.com preview release. Also
         kicking about: the QuickTime 3.0 preview developer release.
         http://www.download.com/  - ICQ 98 : it's in here somewhere
         http://quicktime.apple.com/preview/     - those Apple guys.


                                >> MEMEPOOL <<
                              hasta la altavista

         www.handykey.com ... who owns trademark to "Internet
         Explorer"? Hint: it's not Microsoft... alcopop market
         collapses as teenyboppers move to port, cigars... a
         staggering "1 out of every 130" Icelanders own footy sim
         CHAMPIONSHIP MANAGER '97/98, estimates CTW... fanfic of the
         week: www.geocities.com/SoHo/Studios/7708/... emulator page
         o' the month: http://ds.dial.pipex.com/town/estate/dh69/
         ... do Microsoft webservers serve Explorer clients
         first?... www2.gol.com/users/zapkdarc/ ... amateur rocket
         of the century: www.hafan.demon.co.uk/manhole.htm
         ...playing the Beastie Boys' Sabotage over the opening
         scene from STAR WARS (as Darth emerges from smoke)...
         www.alexchiu.com ... www.fsc.fujitsu.com/language/home-e.html
         ... 38,000 victims of Moldavian porn scam can claim
         money back - if they dare... weapon of the millenium:
         http://omnibus.uni-freiburg.de/~jepsen/thz/lassword.htm ...


                               >> GEEK MEDIA <<
                         i/o for those too tired to o

         TV>> rivalling even BBC2's bizarre theme evenings, BBC1
         dedicated today's daytime output to a celebrarion of "Red
         Hair" (Fri, 9am-3.30pm), with a specially freckley Kilroy
         and "links with asthma", but no really famous gingers - eg
         Bonnie Langford, Chris Evans, Malcolm McLaren (or Malcolm
         X)... Danish porn docu STORYVILLE (10pm, Sat, BBC2)
         "contains some nudity and strong language" - thank you, the
         Radio Times... Bristolian beatmasters Roni Size and Tricky
         are (respectively) profiled in THE WORKS (7.30pm, Sat,
         BBC2) and ARTHOUSE (11.05pm, Sun, C4) - Arthouse is maybe
         the more prestigious slot, considering that The Works also
         profiled Bush and Hughie Green... here's hoping for a
         dramatic "-I'm Spartacus! -No, *I'm* Spartacus" end to the
         horrifically entertaining I'M ALAN PARTRIDGE (10pm, Mon,
         BBC2)... Tommy Lee Jones battles cook-turned-commando
         Steven Seagal over how much they know about cartoons in
         all-at-sea actioner UNDER SIEGE (9.30pm, Tue, BBC1)...
         Scully faces brain cancer (caused by alien abduction, or
         just a warning from the producers not to hold out for a
         massive payrise?), and the Lone Gunmen return as true
         heroes of THE X FILES (10.15pm, Wed, BBC1)... oh, and Steve
         Martin's last *great* film, ROXANNE (9pm, Thu, C5) is
         actually based on some French literature, and not the
         Police/Puff Daddy song of the same name...

         MOVIES>> basically a week of good ideas for movies spoiled
         by ropey execution, whether it's the gripping casting of De
         Niro, Stallone, Keitel - and Janeane Garofolo! - in latter-
         day Western COPLAND (imdb: crime / drama / police /
         vigilante / small-town / conspiracy)... or the Sister-Act-
         On-The-River-Kwai singalong PARADISE ROAD (MPAA rated: R -
         for "fairly graphic scenes of women being beaten and
         tortured, as well as some nudity")... then there's 2
         way-too-unpleasant crime thrillers: Billy Zane and Gina
         Gershon in THIS WORLD, THEN THE FIREWORKS (imdb: crime /
         incest / drama), or the remake of the inspiration for
         Keitel's role in Pulp Fiction, CURDLED (MPAA rated: R - for
         "violence/gore, and brief language")... big old John
         Goodman and a semi-Britcom cast will warm the heart of any
         Micro Machines fan in THE BORROWERS (MPAA rated: PG - for
         "mild peril and some crude humor")... while for outright
         seasonal sentiment, check your cynicism for the re-released
         Capra classic IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE (imdb: drama /
         frustration / angel / suicide / christmas / bank / fantasy)
         - not to be confused with Nikki Sinn's adult video homage,
         TITS A WONDERFUL LIFE (imdb: sex / hardcore)...

         "REAL" RADIO>> pompous discussions of the word "baggy" in I
         WANNA BE ADORED (9pm, Sun, R1), as Radio 1 mourn the
         passing of the Stone Roses *only* 14 months after they
         split... this week, it's secret river bathing that's
         apparently BETTER THAN SEX (9.15pm, Mon, R4) - well, for
         Radio 4 listeners, maybe... sporting a pair of Harry Palmer
         specs a decade before Jarvis, mad lo-fi veteran Jad Fair
         twiddles Half Japanese's knobs in another session for JOHN
         PEEL (8.40pm, Tue, R1)... they probably won't be
         namechecking Sid and Hattie's "Wedded Bliss" agency in
         Carry On Loving when THE NETWORK (8.30pm, Tue, R4) explores
         the history of computer dating... foul-mouthed screenwriter
         Kevin Smith gets 25 minutes to explain just *why* she had
         that annoying squeaky voice, as the writer/director of
         Clerks, Chasing Amy (but not Superman Lives) gets
         interviewed in POSTSCRIPT (10pm, Wed, R3)... FINDING
         FELLOWS (2.00pm, Thu, R4) is the bizarre title for another
         of R4's seemingly endless supply of posh geek dramas, this
         time about "identity on the net"... with Brass Eye
         incredibly passed over (in favour of Whose Line Is It
         Anyway) in C4's depressing democratic evening, Radio 1
         continues to pass over BLUE JAM (12midnight, Thu, R1), just
         in case anyone complains about those live reports from
         crucifixions...


                                 >> COMPO <<
                  will swap "livelihood" for "shoddy gifts"

         Only one more week to go in our increasingly perilous hack-
         an-URL-win-a-prize contest (http://www.ntk.net/compo/ for
         details and disclaimers). Last weeks' winner is David Cross
         of... ahh, a government organisation. Congrats, David - you
         win a "FIGHTING FORCE" disk for the PlayStation (no
         instructions, but how complicated can it be?) and,
         fittingly, a life-size poster of James Bond that we nicked
         from a press launch. We have no idea how we're going to get
         that it to you, though. Could you just send the boys
         around?

         This week's clue is for an URL in the form
         http://www.********.co.uk, where the blank is filled with
         the answer to this question:

               What product "hyper"links pro golfer KARRIE WEBB with
               ad agency LOWE HOWARD-SPINK?

        (and you can't do this using normal search strings. We checked.)


                              >> SMALL PRINT <<

      Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
        happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
      on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
    nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
      It is registered at the Post Office as "as seen on the Jennicam".
                 ( http://www.jennicam.org/gallery/j31.jpg )

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