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NTK 2007 NTK 2006 NTK 2005 NTK 2004 NTK 2003 NTK 2002 NTK 2001 NTK 2000 NTK 1999 NTK 1998 29/12/97 #27 Review of '97, big TV, readers' efforts, Happy New Year! 19/12/97 #26 Microsoft smacks back, OpenGL losses, Paarty! 12/12/97 #25 Yahoo hacked, OpenGL victories, DOJ smack Microsoft 05/12/97 #24 Cybersquatting blues, MSN puzzles, and the return of the FiReD 28/11/97 #23 Bactel spurned, hackers liberated and the erotic olympics 21/11/97 #22 Gates as Caligula, ISO Java and .NOT 14/11/97 #21 FOOF bug, Easynet goofed, good food 07/11/97 #20 E-on bust, Kashpureff nicked, Apple silly. 31/10/97 #19 StrongARM tactics, laser ban, Sci-Fi Con 2.0 24/10/97 #18 Microsoft naughtiness, Quake II, Mark Leyner 17/10/97 #17 Cassini, Survival Research Labs, SlashCon 10/10/97 #16 Sun vs Gates, Pickering and the ZX Psion 03/10/97 #15 Worldcom, IE4.0, and Negativland 26/09/97 #14 Crypto weirdness, Easynet moneymaking and Win95 cracking. 19/09/97 Holiday Special #5 MiniNTK - by the seaside. 12/09/97 Holiday Special #4 MiniNTK - the nation mourns. 05/09/97 Holiday Special #3 MiniNTK - to "Di" for. 29/08/97 Holiday Special #2 MiniNTK - "the one with all the urls". 22/08/97 Holiday Special #1 MiniNTK - live from Mir. 15/08/97 #13 HIP fallout, surveillance and kites. 08/08/97 #12 Jobs & Gates, game.com and HIP '97. 01/08/97 #11 Boys for the Jobs, Clan Negroponte and Sci-Fi Archaeologists. 25/07/97 #10 LINX update, Virus wars, ECAL '97. 18/07/97 #9 Internic spazzes, fibre slashes, and the dreaded Ecstacy 11/07/97 #8 Amelio goes, NHS hate TTP, and Hard *ptuii* Wired. 04/07/97 #7 Windows 98, Mars, and no "Independence Day" references. 27/06/97 #6 CDA, Cousteau, Access All Areas the third. 20/06/97 #5 Psion, Iridium, and Lee Harvey Oswald. 13/06/97 #4 Comcast, Viewdata Revival Movement, Osmose. 06/06/97 #3 Microsoft in Cambridge, Arthur C. Clarke Award, Earplugs 30/05/97 #2 Sega/Bandai, Robert Anton Wilson, Perl Conference 23/05/97 #1 Crypto, Ken Campbell, the Beeb. Michelle. 16/05/97 Final Beta - Rhapsody, MIDI Karaoke, Jimmy Hill. 09/05/97 Second Beta - BIB, The Hugos, Geek Golf. 02/05/97 First Beta - Brandname tattooing, bad Deep Blue predictions. 21/03/97 Appalling first efforts. |
_ _ _____ _ __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the UK> | \ | |_ _| |/ / _ __ ____10/10/97_ o Join! Mail 'subscribe ntknow' | \| | | | | ' / | '_ \ / _ \ \ /\ / / o to majordomo@unfortu.net | |\ | | | | . \ | | | | (_) \ V V / o Website (+ archive) lives at: |_| \_| |_| |_|\_\|_| |_|\___/ \_/\_/ o http://www.ntk.net/ "People underestimate what companies can do under competitive pressure. Nobody saw Netscape coming and no-one is really sure where we are going." - JIM BARKSDALE, CEO of Netscape somebody else want to look at the map? >> HARD NEWS << soft wariness "American taxpayers, companies, and government built the Internet. This is something uniquely American." So said the uniquely American Representative for Mississippi, Charles "Chip" Pickering - keen footballer, farmer, and chairman of the US House Science Committee. He was defending his committee's decision this week to consider legislation banning non-Americans from registering .com addresses, and his horror at the idea of passing control of domain name admin to a bunch of foreign Swiss guys. Also, the committee was very concerned that NetNames (a company run by a known British citizen, Ivan Pope) had been going around actually *aiding* and *abetting* Libya by running its .ly domain - in direct contravention to the USA's foreign policy. This despicable act, of course, would go unchecked if domain names were controlled by a neutral international body. We at NTK applaud Mr Pickering's intent on keeping the Internet free of foreigners (particularly the Libyan bits), and have extradited ourselves from .com domain as a show of support. Also, we'd like to take this space to condemn outright the Gadaffi-lover Pope, who has already registered the terrorist domains "net.ly" and "f.ly". http://www.msnbc.com/news/113761.asp#BODY - can no-one stop this evil dictator? http://democracy.net/events/09301997/realaudio.cgi?soundbite=briefing - fast forward to 20:20 to hear his evil plans http://www.ntk.net/ - what? He says we can't have .net either? But .co.uk sucks! You'll have read about NORWEB's "breakthrough in sending data through the electrical supply" in all the papers. And, if you're like us, you'll have greeted it with a hearty "yeah, riight". Well, in answer to your unspoken, cynical, questions - yes, it does include an uplink (the 1Mbps is *bidirectional*), yes, NORWEB do have some clue about connecting to the Net (they were involved in the setting up of MaNAP - see NTKs passim - and have fibre all over the North West) and no, it isn't 1Mbps straight into the home (you'll be sharing that bandwidth with the other 200 or so families connected via your local sub-station). In terms of performance, it's not dissimilar to ADSL, BT's chosen technology to ram high bandwidth up their copper telephone wires, but then, BT aren't exactly in a hurry to make phone access redundant, are they? BT themselves gave a muted response to Norweb's announcement, saying they did not believe their business would be affected because "strong content was the key to success on the Internet." Yeah, riight. http://www.adsl.com/ - those Hugh Laurie ads must be worth *billions* http://www.norweb.net/ - oh, and it won't work in the US. Phew, eh, Mr Pickering? http://www.ntk.net/archive.cgi?back=a97/now0725.txt&line=40#l - expect a glut of Oasis Websites by 3rd quarter 98 Thick impenetrable smoke continued to billow over the island of JAVA this week, as current rulers SUN MICROSYSTEMS set fire to thousands of acres of MICROSOFT licensing contract. Sun filed suit Tuesday against Microsoft over Explorer 4.0's implementation of the Java language, claiming (hold your breath) trademark infringement, false advertising, breach of contract, unfair competition, interference with prospective economic advantage, inducing breach of contract and dumping that giant 'E' on Netscape's porch last week (technically a Class A drugs offence). What Sun seem *really* riled about is Microsoft's seeming intent to ignore Sun's plans for future Java class libraries. The key to Java's power lie with these libraries, which a) Sun will control and b) Microsoft won't. But Explorer ships with a few classes of Microsoft's own - ones that neatly seek to replace Sun's. They can't get Gates on this trickiness - but Sun do believe they can catch him on other tweaks to the current libs that Microsoft couldn't resist making. So, will a swift settlement help clear the air over Java? Judging by the length of previous MS cases, it's going to be a long time before the rains come again. http://www.sun.com/announcement/ - best use of "fear, uncertainty and doubt" in a press release http://www.macinsider.com/mozilla.jpeg more 'on e' jokes here http://seawifs.gsfc.nasa.gov/SEAWIFS/IMAGES/SEAWIFS/fires.jpg - call it pathetic fallacy Another thing the US doesn't have - yet - is a suitable legal recourse against spamming. Scotland Yard's Computer Crime Unit were called in recently to assist the Isle of Man ISP ENTERPRISE NET, following a series of bulk-mailed messages which seemed to emanate from their dial-up accounts. A gentleman is currently helping police with their inquiries. And that's all we can say at this stage. We'll keep you informed. http://orion.webspan.net/~arny/cmuse.html - that Computer Misuse Act in full http://www.enterprise.net - for legal reasons we can't make jokes in this story >> ANTI-NEWS << you ran that past us - again? "Flaming the famous is popular on the Internet" uncovers CNN... Times INTERFACE section refers to "degauzing" disks - that's removing the lint inside, is it?... TORY PARTY now has fewer subscribers than C|NET's SHAREWARE DESPATCH... EVENING STANDARD warns Blair against being taken in by Bill Gates hype, then states "his Explorer 4 system is now the dominant navigational software on the Internet"... INTERFACE journalist visits EU Net regulation conference, asks "What is PICS?"... STEVE JOBS aims to "kick ass"... BBC clamps down on small Notts bakery for making TELETUBBIES BISCUITS... DEMON gets EASYNET-style license to operate as telco... bug found in Money 98, IE 4.0... RAY HAMMOND discovers Microsoft investing in biotech, deduces Gates is planning "immortality"... after Shift Control, TIMES (creators of renowned INTERFACE section) to launch on-line cyber-hip students' mag... >> EVENT QUEUE << a social calendar for the interrupt-driven Just one week till the start of DEVELOP '97, Miller Freeman's combined exhibition/conference for games coders and software groupies, which runs from 17/10/97 to 19/10/97. Celebs this year include ubiquitous former Bullfrog Peter Molyneux, Dave "Earthworm Jim" Perry, and - most excitingly - EUGENE JARVIS, the man behind Defender, Robotron, Stargate and, er, Cruisin' USA. Taking place at The Novotel, Hammersmith (didn't they hold Amiga shows there once?), the event hopes to acknowledge the "growing importance of AI, 3D and online gaming", though if the latter's more your bag, also check out Online Games 1997, from 4/11/97 to 5/11/97 at the Cafe Royal on Regent St. (Is that perhaps a slightly smaller venue?) http://www.develop96.com/ - old, but it's the same every year; replace Saturn with N64 http://www.cs.uregina.ca/~bakay/jarvis/jarvis.html - the very essence of "essential cool" Want to be doused in anti-matter? Want an injection of radioactive water? Want a photo of YOUR OWN BRAIN? That's the deal going down at the WELLCOME DEPARTMENT OF COGNITIVE NEUROLOGY, who are on the lookout for volunteers for experiments involving their Positron Emission Tomography (PET) and Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) units. You'll spend a couple of hours doing some simple tasks while huge bits of impressive machinery scan your head. The radioactivity of the water, which is injected into your arm, is minimal (equivalent to around 9 months in Devon or about .2 seconds in Balei, see below), the photo of your brain can be ftp'd to the site of your choice or printed out, and you get a free Institute of Neurology T-shirt. We genuinely think this is a great deal. Are we mad? There's only one real way to find out... http://www.fil.ion.ucl.ac.uk/volunteers.html - or contact Dr Naranda Ramnani directly on 0171 833 7484 http://www.spb.su/times/284-285/radioactive.html - Reclaim The Streets readers: please calm down Continuing that old rivalry, Mr Patrick Stewart has taken Shatner's lead in planning a new marriage. That's right - Captain Picard has engaged the babe. His fiancee is Wendy Neuss, a producer on Star Trek: Voyager. Stewart has been married twice previously - once to choreographer Sheila Falconer, and once in that Season 5 episode when he touches the satellite thing and lives out an entire life on a doomed planet, only to find it was all - a dream! http://204.162.80.99/News/Items/0,1,1761,00.html - somewhat old news, but we thought you'd want to know >> TRACKING << web site come by this way two moons past As predicted in NTK (actually, it was a joke), you can now run Horace Goes Skiing on the PSION SERIES 5. Yup, the beta of a Psion ZX SPECTRUM Emulator is available for download. Even more impressively, the same company has released a shaded 3D Doom WAD renderer. We can't wait to see what they do when John Carmack releases the full Doom source later this year, as promised. Or if they get hold of the pirated Quake source that's doing the rounds. Or if they take any more of our jokes so seriously. http://www.palmtop.nl/spectrum.html - the great thing is, the Series 5 has *better* resolution http://www.palmtop.nl/encore.html - what *is* it with RISC chips and emulators, huh? http://www.ntk.net/archive.cgi?back=a97/now0620.txt&line=18#l - just for the record Connectix have released Speed Doubler 8, the MacOS- compatible version of their popular, ah, speed doubling software for the Mac. Extra features include a QuicKeys- alike, which allows you to assign keys to perform sets of Finder commands, and a folder synchronising utility. The package costs $49.00, and they've organised a rebate system for Connectix users - but only in the US. Guess we're not uniquely American enough for them. http://www.connectix.com/html/speeddoubler.html - run it on a 350Hz Mac, and you go back in time A medium-to-heavily buggy pre-release of DREAMWEAVER, Macromedia's promising HTML design suite, is available to download from their site. Nice touches include support for layers and dynamic HTML programming, tight source generation, plus a vaguely-comprehensible method for dealing with frames. Down points - we couldn't run it for more than five minutes before it puked on our shoes. Not so much try before you buy, as try before *they* try. http://www.dreamweaver.com - masochistic first adopter/designer hybrids, sign up They're just catching on to Teletubbies and, by way of cultural exchange (or perhaps reprisal), the US is coming right back with SOUTH PARK, a mildly controversial pseudo- 2D/3D animation that started life as a short film depicting a fight between Jesus and Father Christmas. The show already seems to have been banned in Canada, but Comedy Central are catering to fans everywhere with a themed South Park chat area, using The Palace software to emulate classic show activities like "kicking the baby, killing Kenny, or making Stan puke". Also hoping to gross millions: Ren And Stimpy creators SPUMCO, who launch their new net- only Shockwave cartoon, The Goddamn George Liquor Program, next Wednesday. http://www.weirdness.net/~acd/soxmas/soxmas.mov - 50 megs, but worth it http://comedycentral.com http://www.spumco.com - let's hope it wasn't just banned 'cos it was shit >> MEMEPOOL << hasta la altavista Gameboy inventor GUMPEI YOKOI goes to that secret level in the sky... SOJOURNER contact re-established, reports current NTK heartthrob on +1 800 391 6654... OASIS heckled with laser pointers... www.afterlife.org/ ... how much would you pay to see KILLER WHALES and GREAT WHITE SHARKS fighting?... www.westword.com/extra/conspire.html ... Best IE4.0 error message so far "We need your fax number so that we can respect your wish not to receive unwanted faxes" ... a recent domain name transfer document (.com, Chip!) authorised by all five SPICE GIRLS... British company registers TRICORDER as trademark... where is Jet Set Willy's MATTHEW SMITH?... www.snotartwig.com/home.html ... at last! Duke Nukem action figures!... www.sagebrush.com/~sells/ ... when Bill Gates registered at one UK Website, the password hint he was sent was "it's where you work"... BBC 75th birthday warts-and-all docu "stops" at 1987, when JOHN BIRT joined... Lego Island? LEGO DOOMWAD! www.gyugyi.com/legocad/legocad.html >> MO' MEDIA << why don't your turn in and do something less interesting? TV>> the weekend starts with multiple deja-vu - wasn't Sam Raimi/Coen Bros shlocker CRIMEWAVE (12.10am, Fri, BBC1) shown on C5 just a few weeks ago?... Ross and Rachel split up, get back together again in FRIENDS (9pm, Fri, C4), should anyone still care... plus: there seem to be *two* "Carry On" movie seasons running simultaneously on LWT (CARRY ON FOLLOW THAT CAMEL, 2.55pm, Sat) and C4 (CARRY ON CONSTABLE, 5.55pm, Sun)... CLIVE BARKER'S A-Z OF HORROR (11.30pm, Sat, BBC2) turns its tedious attentions to possession classic The Exorcist, but is fortunately followed by understated black and white spookfest THE HAUNTING (12.10am, Sat, BBC2) - tough competition for Tiswas' favourite car chase in THE BLUES BROTHERS (12midnight, Sat, ITV)... surprise '70s repeat of the week is, of course, aren't-foreigners-funny sitcom MIND YOUR LANGUAGE (4.15pm, Sun, LWT only)... whoever decided that it should be sci-fi every week on THE OUTER LIMITS (9.15pm, BBC2, Sun) has improved it no end... well *done* the BBC - those out-of-date episodes of THE SIMPSONS (6pm, Mon & Fri, BBC2) are now back twice a week - for five weeks only... the final DECISIVE WEAPONS (8pm, Mon, BBC2) can't seem to make up its mind about the F117A stealth fighter, while the terminally boring EQUINOX (9pm, Mon, C4) looks, aptly enough, at comas... it's not just rounding off 75 mins of sitcom greats with SEINFELD and LARRY SANDERS (from 11.15pm, Tue, BBC2), THE PHIL SILVERS SHOW is on at midnight nearly every day this week... and, in other good news, the one with the intellectual sports heroes is by far the best episode of SLIDERS (6.45pm, Wed, BBC2) in this (or any other) universe... MOVIES>> in THE GAME (imdb: thriller / mystery), Michael Douglas plays - you've guessed it - another powerful (but vulnerable) man whose life turns upside-down. This time, the culprit is Consumer Recreation Services, perhaps best described as a paintball company gone mad. Not quite as grippingly unpleasant as director David Fincher's previous Se7en, but then again, what is?... alternatively, there's Disney selling public domain culture back to you in HERCULES (imdb: adventure / animation / comedy / musical / hercules / disney-animated-feature / legend), albeit disguised with Gerald Scarfe sketches and oodles of self- parody... still, probably more laughs than Gary Oldman's gritty take on Harry Enfield's "The Slobs", NIL BY MOUTH (MPAA rated: R for "graphic drug use, non-stop strong language, some nudity and brutal domestic violence")... or indeed the latest Robin Williams abomination FATHER'S DAY (MPAA rated: PG-13 for "drug references and some sex- related humor" - by all accounts, not enough of it)... GAMES>> hotly awaited race-car sequel FORMULA 1 '97 (Psygnosis, PC & Playstation) did over 2 million quids' worth of business in its first three days on sale, apparently about as much as the UK opening weekend for the movie Men In Black... cute-animals-in-space shoot-em-up LYLAT WARS (Nintendo, N64) seems unlikely to knock F197 off the top spot, but does include a vibrating rumble pack for its UKP59.99 price tag. What we want to know: *who is it* who won't let them use its cooler US title, STARFOX 64, over here? Maybe George Lucas, who apparently doesn't want anyone calling stuff "Star [Anything]"?... KURUSHI (Sony, PlayStation) is the world's most nightmarishly Kafkaesque gothic Tetris clone, but the only realistic fluid movement in speedboat cash-in RAPID RACER (Sony, PlayStation) will be your tears of disappointment and rage... and yes, we here at Special Projects *were* involved in writing some of the questions (though none of the rude swearing ones) in the UK version of YOU DON'T KNOW JACK (BMG, PC & Mac, UKP29.99), and, truth be told, it turned out much better than we thought. Smack your own (slightly wordy) 15 meg demo at www.jackuk.com/ COMPO RESULTS >> You didn't think anyone would take us up on it, did you? Well, neither did we. So it was great reluctance and irritation that we award ten pounds and a bunch of CDs to NTK reader DAVID MERY for winning last week's STALKING BILL GATES challenge. David, who works at NTK's favourite hardcore top-shelf development mag, EXE, not only met the man himself on his visit to Cambridge (requirement #1), but also incomprehensibly harangued him in front of the world's press about releasing the source to the original Gates-and-Allen coded 4KB BASIC (as Gates promised to do almost a decade ago) - winning him an extra bonus fiver. Congratulations to David. And as for you, Mr Gates - the clock is counting. You wouldn't want another court case on your hands, would you? Ha ha ha. Only joking. Please put that writ away. Thankyou. >> XMAS COMPETITION << can life get much better? But there's more. At last, NTK can reveal its long- promised, genuinely job-threatening (for both you and us) SUPER-DUPER XMAS COMPETITION. Winners to this *not* only get a CHOICE GIFTS FROM THE INCREDIBLE HAMPER OF GEEKY GOODIES, *not* only get to APPEAR IN NTK (possibly pseudonymously), but ::drum roll:: every one of them will receive a VIP INVITATION to the infamous ".NOT AWARDS" celebration party, to take place this December in the bustling metropolis of London (rated three stars by Wired Magazine), where they will mix with the lowest shameful ranks of this country's digeradoes. And yet, they will feel no embarrassment for they will be treated as THE LIVING GODS THEY INDUBITABLY ARE. How can you win such incomprehensible plunder? We have to say: it's not easy. To have a chance, you'll need a keen mind - a quick wit. To stand a good chance, you'll have to be the Webmaster of a major corporation or financial institution. And to win the top prize - the coveted "CAPT'N OF THE READERSHIP 1997", you'll have to be out of your fucking mind. For the rules, see http://www.ntk.net/compo/ This week's clue: My top level domains would not concern Chip, My middle, though nine bytes, is made of two bits. Its first char is rolling - at least when it's vocal, The transition is transport, but only the local. My last is in kilobyte but not in computer, My whole is a gauge for annoying commuters. >> SMALL PRINT << Need to Know Now is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent. It is registered at the Post Office as "e-mailing confetti". special spesh thanks to the domainmeisters at www.123domainme.com for saving us from domain transfer purgatory NEED TO KNOW THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK. Archive - http://www.ntk.net/ Excuses - http://www.spesh.com/ntk/ Unsubscribe? Mail majordomo@unfortu.net with 'unsubscribe ntknow'. Subscribe? Mail majordomo@unfortu.net with 'subscribe ntknow'. NTK now is helped by VIRGIN NET, VENUS INTERNET and UNFORTU.NET. They worry about us, but we don't worry about them. (K) 1997 Special Projects. Non-business copying is fine, but retain SMALL PRINT. Contact terry@spesh.com for fascinating commercial license details. Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com. |