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  • NTK 1999
  • 25/12/98
    Holiday Special #8
    Christmas InDin with all the trimmings
  • 18/12/98
    #75
    politic, politics, quake fragfests, politics
  • 11/12/98
    #74
    making a stand, cyberstrikes and proof of a CONSPIRACY
  • 04/12/98
    #73
    Wassenaar, Flavor Flav, Zope!
  • 27/11/98
    #72
    Netscape dies, Cliffilms, Chocolata
  • 20/11/98
    #71
    Phantom Menace, Patches as Art, and Wiki
  • 13/11/98
    #70
    Domains, Ataris, and Tommy Flowers
  • 06/11/98
    #69
    Mark thingy, Christian whatsisname, and Scawen scary name
  • 30/10/98
    #68
    HipCrime, Tron and Halloweeeeen
  • 23/10/98
    #67
    More Tales From The Crypt, Sunbather Falco and Roobarb
  • 16/10/98
    #66
    ADSL, John Prescott, and the Anarchist Bookfair
  • 09/10/98
    #65
    DVD 1 Industry 0, XFM, and Funny Food
  • 02/10/98
    #64
    Sky Digitalis, Clickety-Click
  • 25/09/98
    #63
    Dixons Docks, Orwell Knocks, but Flash gets it clean
  • 18/09/98
    #62
    ISP trust, RISC PC busts, and homeless IT bosses
  • 11/09/98
    #61
    Starr networks, Ya Basta Blasters, token Windows software
  • 04/09/98
    #60
    Explorer runs out of memories, PGP 6, and Pat
  • 28/08/98
    #59
    Whose whois, Gameboy hacking, San Francisco
  • 21/08/98
    Holiday Special #7
    BT Highway Robbery, Bab5 Wrap Party,
    CU Amiga RIP
  • 14/08/98
    Holiday Special #6
    Strange Customs, OpenSource Meet, Victorian Net
  • 07/08/98
    #58
    Microsoft doublethink, Beebisms, Resfest
  • 31/07/98
    #57
    Net myths, Spy cams, and Hartley Hare
  • 24/07/98
    #56
    Beeb Falco, Millions Lost, and Dave "King Stupid" Green
  • 17/07/98
    #55
    Apple booms, DES doomed, DEFCON reaches VI
  • 10/07/98
    #54
    iMacs, Script Kiddies, and Is He Serious?
  • 03/07/98
    #53
    Ireland, Italy, and the End of The World
  • 26/06/98
    #52
    Net censors, Psion, and dead as a SOHO
  • 19/06/98
    #51
    Nominaughtiness, databastardery, and Patrick Moore event
  • 12/06/98
    #50
    BT goes cheap, Doc Solomon goes West, and ICQ goes downmarket
  • 05/06/98
    #49
    No news, street news, sweet news
  • 29/05/98
    #48
    @Home, Ross' Foundation, Power Renames
  • 22/05/98
    #47
    Gateswar!, Open Source flightsim, and a happy birthday
  • 15/05/98
    #46
    MacOS X, Anarchist Studies, and bloody Killer Net
  • 08/05/98
    #45
    Red Buses, Apple iMacs, more Killer Net
  • 01/05/98
    #44
    Crypto policy, IMDB sales, MP3 in your car
  • 24/04/98
    #43
    Falcomania, ICA knobbled, Spacewar!
  • 17/04/98
    #42
    BIB rumours, Intel downturn, and Dougie Coupland
  • 10/04/98
    #41
    RIPE.NET, Microsoft bribes, Richard 'Trek Wars' Barry
  • 03/04/98
    #40
    Demon sales, USENET wars, MOZILLA!
  • 27/03/98
    #39
    JavaOne, Edge Dunderheads, Virtual Turntables
  • 20/03/98
    #38
    LineOne, Scallywag, and Fete de l'Internet
  • 13/03/98
    #37
    Crypto, Technorealists, Crypto-Technorealists
  • 06/03/98
    #36
    Gates and the Senators, IWF takes their PICS, Bull Electronic
  • 27/02/98
    #35
    BIB backtracking, Hacker witch hunts, UKCAC
  • 20/02/98
    #34
    Crypto shenanigans, Alledged Jobs nuttiness, Action SuperCross
  • 13/02/98
    #33
    Key escrow, Tempest spooks, XML
  • 06/02/98
    #32
    Bill flanned, Postel goes postal, mealy MILIA melee
  • 30/01/98
    #31
    Compaq gobble DEC, Bill damage-limits, Time Crisis 2
  • 23/01/98
    #30
    Netscape lose the source,
    CU Amiga "sucks dogs", Pinker speaks!
  • 16/01/98
    #29
    Excite gets kids, Dennis has kittens, Webmedia kicks bucket
  • 09/01/98
    #28
    Microsoft mad, Apple make money, the zine scene
  • NTK 1997
  • HARD NEWS
  • ANTI-NEWS
  • EVENT QUEUE
  • TRACKING
  • MEMEPOOL
  • GEEK MEDIA
  • SMALL PRINT

 _   _ _____ _  __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the uk>
| \ | |_   _| |/ / _ __   ____06/11/98_ o join! mail 'subscribe ntknow'
|  \| | | | | ' / | '_ \ / _ \ \ /\ / / o  to majordomo@lists.ntk.net
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|_| \_| |_| |_|\_\|_| |_|\___/ \_/\_/   o     http://www.ntk.net/
        

     "I'm not prepared to talk about specifics but we have
       seen organized criminal groups using the proceeds from software
          counterfeiting to pay for terrorist operations overseas."
                              - BRAD SMITH, Microsoft general counsel 
                       air strikes on Norwegian warez sites to follow
      http://www.pcworld.com/pcwtoday/article/0,1510,8566+1+6,00.html

 
                                >> HARD NEWS <<
                              scary "woooooooo"s 
                                
         Remember, remember the fifth of - I'm sorry, it's gone
         again, pleaded BILL GATES this week, as his taped testimony
         to the DOJ Truth Commission revealed an inability
         to recall the details of his own e-mail outbox. We guess
         then he won't remember the words of the NYT column where he
         noted "I can remember all the moves of many chess games that
         I've played. I can still remember all my lines in a high
         school play, 'Black Comedy... I remember financial data very
         well, too. I can visualize the source code to the version of
         BASIC that I wrote for the first microcomputer, back in
         1975." But I can't *quite* remember sending a three-line
         e-mail which included the phrase "Do we have a clear plan on
         what we want Apple to do to undermine Sun?"
         http://www.microsoft.com/billgates/columns/1996q&a/qa960604.htm
                        - fifth of... fifth of... fifth of amendment?
         http://www.cspan.org/watch/exclusive1.htm
         - I deny having developer relations with that ... platform
http://www.techserver.com/newsroom/ntn/info/110398/info8_4154_noframes.html
         - there can be no red faces at the Redmond
        
         Another e-mail that Gates failed to recall was, of course,
         the Halloween Document, a sharp memo shoved into Eric
         Raymond by a masked "brother" on the run from Redmond
         Asylum. But was it meant as a trick or treat? While the
         gathered Free Softwarelings scared themselves into even more
         recursive states ("We shouldn't read it! That's exactly what
         he'd *expect* us to do!"), author Vinod Valloppillillilloopp
         returned in - Halloween Document II. In this sequel, he
         tries Linux, and likes it. "The feeling was exhilarating
         and addictive", he writes, "as it was when first I heard the
         screams of the OS/2 evangelists in Sub-Level Five".
         http://www.opensource.org/halloween.html
                - well, the mark-up's a little hard to read sometimes
         http://www.tuxedo.org/~esr/html-hell.html
             - we refer the honourable gentleman to his previous page
         http://www.pbs.org/cringely/pulpit/pulpit19981105.html
                                - Gaddafi-lover Cringely speaks sense
http://www.scripting.com/davenet/98/11/howWindowsDeveloperThinks.html
              - Winer writes "I am not a gorilla". Nobody tell Glenn!
         http://www.sjmercury.com/columnists/gillmor/docs/dg110398.htm
                   - still no-one knows what "de-commoditizing" means
         
         Over the next month, 20,000 UK companies will be sent a
         survey by the anti-piracy body, the BUSINESS SOFTWARE
         ALLIANCE. It's the usual stuff: How many employees are you
         responsible for? How many PCs do you have in your company?
         Do you realise that as MD, you are responsible for the
         legality of software? Do you realise that if you don't fill
         this in and return to the BSA within 21 days, they'll put
         you on a special "blacklist" of companies that they suspect
         of harbouring illegal software, and blitz you with mailings
         and possibly even begin investigations into the legality of
         your software purchases? Do you think there's anything odd
         in being penalised for *not* returning a junk questionnaire?
         You don't?
         http://www.bsa.org/news/press/spool/910220507.html
                  - would you like to join our book of the month club?

         
                                >> ANTI-NEWS << 
                             berating the obvious

         Finally, someone paid http://www.hotwired.com to lose the
         colours... COMCOMCOMCOMCOMCOMCOM.COM currently "on hold"...
         LLOYDS BANK Website closes between 0400-1000AM (server
         needs a nap)... DANNY KELLY gets big plug for www.m365.com
         in Guardian, despite its current non-existence... Brain
         Structure May Play Role in Children's Ability To Learn To
         Read, reveals study... DIGICASH runs out of money... N2K
         "forget" to pay Ticketmaster $3 million... Human Error
         Responsible for Most Data Loss, uncovers survey... IE5.0 to
         feature "Go" button, for users who don't know you have to
         press return after an URL... APPLE claim to have "patented"
         the colour Bondi Blue... PC DIRECT illustrates computer
         security article exclusively with stills from WarGames movie
         - mentions WarGames in first sentence... Falco! SYQUEST
         crashes - but they took backups, right? ... Microsoft buy
         LINKEXCHANGE for $250 million - but how are we going to
         break it to http://www.stopgates.com/ ?... BBC.CO.UK now
         "Millennium Product" (ie will be usable sometime in next)
         ... who will find a future for http://www.streetmap.co.uk?


                               >> EVENT QUEUE << 
                              stop! scanner time! 

         Pity the traditional craftsfolk, outmoded by rapid
         technological change - craftsfolk like DJ SCANNER, whose
         live mixes and recordings of mobile phone calls were the
         talk of the town back in the heady days of the early '90s.
         Obviously this hasn't been quite such a poignant artform
         since digital mobiles hit the scene, and he's now reduced to
         hanging around near London tourist attractions, recording
         and photographing the ambience - and, we believe, somehow
         "converting the digital images into sounds". Scanner will be
         performing the resultant "Surface Noise" on a travelling
         double decker bus between St Paul's Cathedral and Big Ben
         from 6pm on 12/11/98-14/11/98 (UKP12.50, advance booking
         essential), and hopefully providing some sort of tour
         commentary, since his voice - oddly - sounds exactly like
         the lead singer out of Jamiroquai.
         http://www.innercity.demon.co.uk/scanner.htm 
         - is it just us, or does the B*Witched Rollercoaster single
         http://home1.gte.net/davidra/tv/double.htm 
         - ...sound just like "Get on board, get on board"?
 

                                >> TRACKING <<
                  making good use of the things that we find 

         You know how everything in UNIX is supposed to be a file?
         You know Perl lets you do everything you'd ever want to do?
         You know that means, logically, you can return UNIX to its
         pure, pre-Fall state, where everything *is* a file -
         anything you want? So you could, say, chdir to
         "http://www.yahoo.com/", then chdir to all the links on that
         page? And you know that there's only one person insane
         enough to thus let you write your own filing system - in
         Perl? Yes, from the people who brought you the Turing
         Machine using only dd and sh, we roundly announce:
         http://dd.sh/perlfs/
         - next: X-Windows servers using trained cellular automata
         
                  
                                >> MEMEPOOL << 
                              hasta la altavista

         that's not a Millennium Bug - that's a *feature*:
         http://www.go2zero.com/... are you wearing L'OREAL
         "Industria" Barcode transfer tattoos (Sainsburys, 2.99UKP)
         on *your* forehead? well, you will. It is foretold ... when
         arty Mac types go Windows NT, can firearms be far away? -
         http://photo.net/wtr/mac-to-pc-migration.html ... IONICA -
         with Sugar or without? ... BOB KANE slips away from
         Commissioner Gordon for the last time... the "Catch The
         Chicken" Quake mod... let's see MICROSOFT try to
         de-commoditize www.windows2000.com ... apart, TV nostalgia
         and Macromedia Flash are execrable, together -
         http://625.simplenet.com/tv_logos/flash.htm ... blue
         nitro... http://www.pretext.com/ ... analog transformer
         watches... just how patronising can an RFC be?
         ftp://ftp.ietf.org/internet-drafts/draft-ietf-uswg-fyi4-00.txt
         ... "So we did what any bereaved FURBY owner would do - we
         cut him up and took pictures." http://www.phobe.com/furby/
         ... it's the subjective IMDB - http://www.mrqe.com/ ...
         http://no.no.youdontunderstand.itsallreallybad.com/ ...
                  

                               >> GEEK MEDIA << 
                      may contain strongly-typed language

         TV>> we've been personally assured that the new series of
         ROBOT WARS (6.45pm, Fri, BBC2) *will* be more violent,
         though not due to the presence of new Clarkson-replacing
         rent-a-cyber-presenter, Craig Charles... still, Jeremy
         reappears spouting his knee-jerk reactionary nonsense on
         pseudo chat-show CLARKSON (9pm, Sun, BBC2) - "I've thought
         of the only tube station that doesn't contain any of the
         letters of the word 'Mackerel'"; "Well, I don't live in
         London, don't know the names of any tube stations, and
         therefore *don't care*"... Lee/ Cushing '60s sci-fi scare
         NIGHT OF THE BIG HEAT (12.10am, Fri, BBC1) sounds a bit like
         the pilot movie of Voyage To The Bottom Of The Sea... and
         another excellent arguing-Niles episode of FRASIER (10pm,
         Fri, C4)... sadly, doesn't look like Armando Ianucci will be
         doing a special "Remembrance Day" edition of Saturday Night
         Armistice this weekend - scariest look back should be the
         subterranean WW1 tunneling tactics in THE UNDERGROUND WAR
         (7pm, Sat, C4)... use of unnecessary violence in the
         avoidance of THE BLUES BROTHERS (10.30pm, Sat, ITV) *has*
         been approved... dated, dull, featuring Nancy "RoboCop"
         Allen - once-acclaimed telekinetic teen scream CARRIE (10pm,
         Sun, BBC2), frankly, doesn't live here any more... full-on
         Will Smith/ Tea Leoni Miami Vice rip-off BAD BOYS (10pm,
         Sun, C4) is still Michael "The Rock" Bay's best film ever -
         and possibly the greatest cop buddy drama of all time...
         surely new Linehan/ Matthews sketch series BIG TRAIN (10pm,
         Mon, BBC2) - starring Kevin "Simon Quinlank" Eldon - isn't
         *all* understated slice-of-life weirdness featuring '80s pop
         stars?... speaking of which, Christopher "Nigel Tufnel"
         Guest directs, but doesn't appear in pre-The Player
         Hollywood satire THE BIG PICTURE (10.55pm, Mon, C5), with
         Kevin Bacon, Teri Hatcher, Michael "David St Hubbins"
         McKean... among the new lot of - deeply disturbing -
         MYSTERIES WITH CAROL VORDERMAN (8.30pm, Tue, BBC1): "An
         explosion in the sky in the Outer Hebrides which has aroused
         local suspicion"... CUTTING EDGE (9pm, Tue, C4) seems to be
         somewhat blunted on the cut-throat competition between
         celeb-porn rags OK! and Hello! (9pm, Tue, C4)... and let's
         not get our hopes up for the acting skills of fresh young
         cast in "music biz satire" drama THE YOUNG PERSON'S GUIDE TO
         BECOMING A ROCK STAR (10pm, Tue, C4) - and you were hoping
         it was a '90s version of Rockschool... former Sunday Show
         irritation Peter Kay mutates into fly-on-wall spoof motorway
         services staff, a justifiable experiment from C4's COMEDY
         LAB (11.30pm, Wed, C4)... Emergency 999 meets Fantastic
         Voyage in endoscope-filmed BODY STORY (9pm, Thu, C4)...
         SCIENCE AT WAR (9.25pm, Thu, BBC2) delivers a harrowing
         history of poison gas and battlefield chemical weapons...
         still, probably more laughs than Victoria Wood's new sitcom,
         DINNERLADIES (9.30pm, Thu, BBC1)...

         FILM>> so: can you, with a clear conscience, back
         Dreamworks' ANTZ (imdb: computer-animation / ants) against
         Disney/Pixar's A Bug's Life? On one hand, the (often
         ultraviolent) Dreamworks are going up against Disney (yay).
         On the other: it's bloody Spielberg, in "strategic alliance"
         with Bill Gates - who, of course, brought the release
         date forward to "punish" Steve Jobs for his impudence -
         ( http://fnews.yahoo.com/fool/98/09/18/trouble_980918.htm )
         Then again, Antz is excellently celeb-packed, Woody Allen-esque,
         and wasted on kids, apparently... cute camerawork, CCTV
         concept, Nic Cage, inevitably ruined by the usual Brian De
         Palma hysterics, darting everywhere with his SNAKE EYES
         (imdb: hurricane / murder / police / tidal-wave /
         assassination / blockbuster / boxing / casino)... Ice Cube
         directs worthwhile backstage table-dancing comedy drama THE
         PLAYERS CLUB (imdb: catfight / stripper / urban) - less
         degrading than Showgirls or Striptease, for both performers
         and audience... Swingers' Vince Vaughn, swingin' Anne Heche
         put real take on Prisoner's Dilemma game theory in wordy
         would-you-do-time-in-a-foreign-jail-so-your-friend-doesn't-die
         poser RETURN TO PARADISE (imdb: drama / romance /
         thriller)... and going by http://www.lff.org.uk/ , most of
         the LONDON FILM FESTIVAL has sold out already (as usual),
         though not, at time of writing, weirdie numerological
         low-budget sci-fi PI (imdb: judaism / low-budget /
         mathematical-equation / mathematics / paranoia / pi /
         self-mutilation / surreal / chaos-theory / computers /
         cult-favorites / delusion) - full of slogans that sound like
         they're out of Jim Flint's Habitus, and also explains what
         happened to Clint out of Pop Will Eat Itself:
         http://www.pithemovie.com ...

         THUMB CANDY TALKING>> we're too glued to FUTURE COP: LAPD
         (EA, PSX) to move right now ("This product [mech-suit
         chain-guns crims in nightmare dystopia] is not endorsed or
         associated in any way with the Los Angeles Police
         Department"), but fortunately we can hand you over to
         scourge of the home office and friend to the stars, CHARLTON
         "CHARLIE" BROOKER... despite abysmal title, WARGASM (DID,
         PC) is itself very good - sort of a cross between C&C, a
         high-falutin' simulator, and an arcade game. Rousing Wagner
         soundtrack accompanies the gung-ho pornography, excused via
         transparently apologetic storyline about it all taking place
         on the "World Wide War Web"... APOCALYPSE (PSX), starring
         Bruce Willis, isn't as bad as some recent films he's been
         in; looks like a 3D one-player Gauntlet with wisecracks and
         blood. Bruce spouts almost *every* action-hero cliche you've
         ever heard. Cumulative effect hilarious... Jap import
         "DJing" game BEAT MASTER (PSX) starting to appear here,
         rumoured to require special "turntable" controller. Or check
         out HIPHOPMANIA arcade version in some UK arcade test sites
         (oh alright then, we mean Namco Wonderpark)... oh, and
         HALF-LIFE (Sierra, PC) may be "best PC game ever" according
         to - ironically - about 50% of those who've played it
         ("Resident Evil meets Quake meets Quatermass And The Pit.
         Genius.")... and, it being Christmas and all, it must be
         time for another illicit "gore" patch for CARMAGEDDON 2 -
         anyone got an URL yet?... cheers Charlie, and just time to
         close now with games news gossip: http://www.ctw.co.uk
         launched... http://www.cex.co.uk/cex revamped... Future
         Gamer first email not the promised 256K, but "more like
         400"... hacked or just hacked off?
         http://www.ign64.com/news/5572.html ... and thanks to
         everyone who pointed out the Lionhead interview in the new
         EDGE, featuring company staff with curious yet consistent
         names like "Mark thingy", "Christian whatsisname", "Irish
         geezer", "Jean Claude french bloke", and "Scawen scary
         name". The same interview also boasts the snappy call-out
         "MOST GAMES 90% LOOK TO THE PAST FOR THEIR INSPIRATION;
         COMPUTER ARTWORKS' 50% EVOLVA SCIENTIFIC USES 50%COMPLEX
         SCIENTIFIC USES COMPLEX 90% THEORIES 09% THE STATE OF THE
         ORGANIC ART" - as one correspondent (and former Edge
         contributor) points out: "a phrase so Now that it gets
         repeated in edited form on each of the next two pages"...



                               >> SMALL PRINT <<

       Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
         happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
       on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
	  nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
          It is registered at the Post Office as "penny for the guy?"
              http://www.marxists.org/admin/guidelin/balance.htm 
                  

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  • HARD NEWS
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