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  • NTK 1999
  • 25/12/98
    Holiday Special #8
    Christmas InDin with all the trimmings
  • 18/12/98
    #75
    politic, politics, quake fragfests, politics
  • 11/12/98
    #74
    making a stand, cyberstrikes and proof of a CONSPIRACY
  • 04/12/98
    #73
    Wassenaar, Flavor Flav, Zope!
  • 27/11/98
    #72
    Netscape dies, Cliffilms, Chocolata
  • 20/11/98
    #71
    Phantom Menace, Patches as Art, and Wiki
  • 13/11/98
    #70
    Domains, Ataris, and Tommy Flowers
  • 06/11/98
    #69
    Mark thingy, Christian whatsisname, and Scawen scary name
  • 30/10/98
    #68
    HipCrime, Tron and Halloweeeeen
  • 23/10/98
    #67
    More Tales From The Crypt, Sunbather Falco and Roobarb
  • 16/10/98
    #66
    ADSL, John Prescott, and the Anarchist Bookfair
  • 09/10/98
    #65
    DVD 1 Industry 0, XFM, and Funny Food
  • 02/10/98
    #64
    Sky Digitalis, Clickety-Click
  • 25/09/98
    #63
    Dixons Docks, Orwell Knocks, but Flash gets it clean
  • 18/09/98
    #62
    ISP trust, RISC PC busts, and homeless IT bosses
  • 11/09/98
    #61
    Starr networks, Ya Basta Blasters, token Windows software
  • 04/09/98
    #60
    Explorer runs out of memories, PGP 6, and Pat
  • 28/08/98
    #59
    Whose whois, Gameboy hacking, San Francisco
  • 21/08/98
    Holiday Special #7
    BT Highway Robbery, Bab5 Wrap Party,
    CU Amiga RIP
  • 14/08/98
    Holiday Special #6
    Strange Customs, OpenSource Meet, Victorian Net
  • 07/08/98
    #58
    Microsoft doublethink, Beebisms, Resfest
  • 31/07/98
    #57
    Net myths, Spy cams, and Hartley Hare
  • 24/07/98
    #56
    Beeb Falco, Millions Lost, and Dave "King Stupid" Green
  • 17/07/98
    #55
    Apple booms, DES doomed, DEFCON reaches VI
  • 10/07/98
    #54
    iMacs, Script Kiddies, and Is He Serious?
  • 03/07/98
    #53
    Ireland, Italy, and the End of The World
  • 26/06/98
    #52
    Net censors, Psion, and dead as a SOHO
  • 19/06/98
    #51
    Nominaughtiness, databastardery, and Patrick Moore event
  • 12/06/98
    #50
    BT goes cheap, Doc Solomon goes West, and ICQ goes downmarket
  • 05/06/98
    #49
    No news, street news, sweet news
  • 29/05/98
    #48
    @Home, Ross' Foundation, Power Renames
  • 22/05/98
    #47
    Gateswar!, Open Source flightsim, and a happy birthday
  • 15/05/98
    #46
    MacOS X, Anarchist Studies, and bloody Killer Net
  • 08/05/98
    #45
    Red Buses, Apple iMacs, more Killer Net
  • 01/05/98
    #44
    Crypto policy, IMDB sales, MP3 in your car
  • 24/04/98
    #43
    Falcomania, ICA knobbled, Spacewar!
  • 17/04/98
    #42
    BIB rumours, Intel downturn, and Dougie Coupland
  • 10/04/98
    #41
    RIPE.NET, Microsoft bribes, Richard 'Trek Wars' Barry
  • 03/04/98
    #40
    Demon sales, USENET wars, MOZILLA!
  • 27/03/98
    #39
    JavaOne, Edge Dunderheads, Virtual Turntables
  • 20/03/98
    #38
    LineOne, Scallywag, and Fete de l'Internet
  • 13/03/98
    #37
    Crypto, Technorealists, Crypto-Technorealists
  • 06/03/98
    #36
    Gates and the Senators, IWF takes their PICS, Bull Electronic
  • 27/02/98
    #35
    BIB backtracking, Hacker witch hunts, UKCAC
  • 20/02/98
    #34
    Crypto shenanigans, Alledged Jobs nuttiness, Action SuperCross
  • 13/02/98
    #33
    Key escrow, Tempest spooks, XML
  • 06/02/98
    #32
    Bill flanned, Postel goes postal, mealy MILIA melee
  • 30/01/98
    #31
    Compaq gobble DEC, Bill damage-limits, Time Crisis 2
  • 23/01/98
    #30
    Netscape lose the source,
    CU Amiga "sucks dogs", Pinker speaks!
  • 16/01/98
    #29
    Excite gets kids, Dennis has kittens, Webmedia kicks bucket
  • 09/01/98
    #28
    Microsoft mad, Apple make money, the zine scene
  • NTK 1997
  • HARD NEWS
  • ANTI-NEWS
  • EVENT QUEUE
  • TRACKING
  • MEMEPOOL
  • GEEK MEDIA
  • SMALL PRINT
 _   _ _____ _  __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the uk>
| \ | |_   _| |/ / _ __   ____16/10/98_ o join! mail 'subscribe ntknow'
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         "Cut out the slaughter of innocent Albanian civilians, you
         vodka-snorting goofus, or face the wrath of NATO airstrikes
         dropping 500-pound laser-guided bombs on your butt."
                       - C|NET experiments with a broader news agenda
http://www.gamecenter.com/Downloads/Mac/FrontDoor/0,37,0-17,2000.html


                                >> HARD NEWS <<
                                it barely moves 

         Now, didn't we say all along that APPLE would make it? Steve
         Jobs announced profits of $106 million on revenue of $1.6
         billion (same as last year - shhh! shhh!) and revealed that
         soon "You'll be able to get a new Mac for $99". Sweetly,
         some Mac fans thought this was *really true*, rather than
         the Jobsian way of suggesting that it was time to splash out
         on yet another OS upgrade. We also enjoyed Apple's mailing
         to the rhapsodic Macevangelists providing the exact times
         of product placements in this week's TV and films, so that
         the devout could set their VCRs. Everyone's happy. Except...
         why did Jobs, apropos of nothing, insist at the press
         conference, that "we still have our soul"? I mean, you don't
         think that deal with Microsoft involved a third party?
         http://www.apple.com/macos/upgrade/
                                       - oh, smart thinking, Sherlock
         http://www.zdnet.co.jp/magazine/macuser/craft.html
                                                     - a Mac for 99p!

         Deputy Prime Minister JOHN PRESCOTT is learning to route
         around censorship. "The SNP were so ashamed of their policies
         they deleted them from the Internet. I can tell Alex
         Salmond [SNP leader] that in the interests of public
         information we are going to put them back on", he told
         the Labour Party conference. A brilliant scheme, with only a 
         few flaws. Like - wouldn't it have been sensible to
         edit out the "(c) 1996 SNP" comments in the HTML *before*
         copying it without permission? Also, if you do 
         give official sanction to this behaviour, might it be more
         effective if the site you publicise is designed by
         somebody who understands HTML? And should this kind of jape
         really be encouraged by the same Labour party that 
         removed key crypto policy commitments from *their*
         Website after reneging on them, back in June?
         http://www.tibus.com/encryptionuk/labour.html
                                   - lucky someone mirrored those too
         http://www.mcmen.demon.co.uk/SNP.html
                                                  - HTML by committee 
         http://www.mcmen.demon.co.uk/SNP/
                                  - some hope of reading the dox here
         http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Congress/2840/ 
                                         - a degree of accountability

         Maybe BT's just taunting the (presumably highly impatient)
         ADSL target audience with its sluggish roll-out trials - as
         the site is at pains to emphasise, it's not a test of
         the technology, it's a test of the service (to establish
         whether there's actually enough Internet out there for
         people to download at 2Mbps, and just how much over the odds
         people will pay for home access at a reasonable speed).
         Or maybe the announcement, mysteriously postponed from last
         week's TMA31 conference, was aimed to divert attention from
         a local authority in Thurrock, Essex, reported to be
         trialling their own DSL-style broadband services over
         "Keylines", mid-priced BT-owned copper pairs intended for
         (much slower) data applications. Other "broadbandits" are
         keen to play down their promising results, fearing that BT
         will clamp down on unofficial DSL experiments on their
         lines, despite using BABT-approved kit - and because only BT
         has an extensive old-fashioned copper network, they can't go
         to other telcos 'cos they're too high in fibre...
         http://www.serviceview.bt.com/list/current/docs/Private_Cir_/03316.htm
                                               - hey, you do the math
         http://www.zdnet.co.uk/news/1998/40/ns-5703.html
            - is "Goodwins" one of those Extropian surnames, or what?
 

                                >> ANTI-NEWS << 
                             berating the obvious
                   
         Hayes go NO CARRIER... can't launch a major brand without
         breaking EGGS - http://www.ntk.net/doh/egg981012.gif ...
         BBFA psychologists refuse CARMAGEDDON II certification,
         after seeing a four-minute demo... THRESH wipes out plucky
         British Quake champion Billox 56 to -1... US sex columnist
         Dan Savage gets "a disproportionate amount of mail from
         MICROSOFT employees complaining about impotence"... ZAP.COM
         pulls out of everything... E-TRADER caused market crash by
         leaning on keyboard... DEMON director sets up mail filters:
         accidentally broadcasts inbox to entire department... THE
         SUN launches anti-FURBY campaign, citing "They're UKP7 to
         make, but UKP30 in shops" (no economies of scale printing a
         newspaper, then?) plus "they only supply 350,000 so you have
         to fight to get one" (self-restricted profiteering! uh-oh!)


                               >> EVENT QUEUE << 
                         goto's considered non-harmful

         What bookfair has a poster designed by self-proclaimed Clint
         Eastwood body-double Clifford Harper, advertises itself with
         "fuck Private Ryan" stickers, has a sex worker's "show and
         tell" to start off and a huge party to finish? Some kind of
         ANARCHIST BOOKFAIR, that's for sure. Now seventeen years old
         - and acting like it - it's on tomorrow, Saturday 17/10/98,
         from 1000 to 1900 at the irreproducible Conway Hall, Red
         Lion Square, bloody London WC1. Fun-loving rebels or the
         State - see who gets smashed first.
         http://freespace.virgin.net/anarchist.bookfair/ 
                                            - Mr Branson does his bit 


                                >> TRACKING <<
                  making good use of the things that we find 

         The new PERL JOURNAL has been out for three weeks now,
         splashing its payload of Obfuscated Perl Contest entries
         about like a Typhoid-infested floozy. As Europeans, we're
         cheered that French and (quelle surprise) Finnish
         contestants grabbed three out of the four awards, given
         annually for code that's unreadable even by Perl's high
         standards. The US managed to hold on to first place in the
         "Most Powerful Code" section, with Clifford Adams'
         implementation of two encryption systems - including RSA -
         in just five lines. Ironically, by clawing some scrap of
         dignity for the United States, Clifford and TPJ now lay
         themselves open for prosecution by same as outlaw crypto
         munitions-smugglers. Although we'd be amused to see the
         prosecution try to prove that's what the code does.
         http://www.tpj.com/
                       - print version protected by the 1st amendment 
         http://www.tpj.com/tpj/rules
                 - oh, but now it's Lisp, beating Python by a head...


                                >> MEMEPOOL << 
                              hasta la altavista

         creator of SKY DIGITAL banner ad is NTK subscriber: have you
         no sense of decency?... not quite sure what market
         http://www.syphilis.com/ is aiming at... LEXICAL FREENET is
         the new sixdegrees... DR SHUFFLEBRAINS will see you now:
         http://www.indiana.edu/~pietsch/home.html ... world's first
         objective mirror site: http://www.justhow.co.uk/ ... no,
         fsck you! - http://lwn.net/1998/1015/a/f-word.html ...
         Louis and Jane get a cool 10 million dollars each... game
         over for your "Nick Hornby with computers" book pitch:
         http://www.extralife.org/ ... new ATARI 3D GAUNTLET - shit?
         ... how it should be - http://www.classicgaming.com/stella/
         ... "Linus does not scale"... stop press: the ECONOMIST
         gets to the bottom of Art Bell's "disappearance" :
http://www.economist.com/editorial/freeforall/current/index_us3986.html
    
                               
                               >> GEEK MEDIA << 
                      may contain strongly-typed language

         TV>> face it, no matter how many repeats of BLACKADDER GOES
         FORTH (9pm, Fri, BBC2) they churn out, it's never going to
         make up for yet another series of lame impressions atrocity
         STELLA STREET (11.15pm, Fri, BBC2). Director Peter
         Richardson was the least funny one in The Comic Strip, by
         the way, which is certainly saying something... not quite
         the conceptual black and white ancient horror of the TV
         original, but slightly better production values in the
         Hammer remake of QUATERMASS AND THE PIT (1.15am, Fri, C4)...
         also, in "Post Modern Prometheus", a Jerry Springer/Cher
         crossover episode of THE X FILES (9.25pm, Sat, BBC1) that's
         monochrome, funny, even interesting - for a change... or, as
         if you needed it pointed out that you're sitting at home on
         a Saturday night, friendless and alone, heeeeere's BRIDGET
         JONES NIGHT (8.55pm, Sat, BBC2)... still prefer Sharon
         Stone's performance on THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW (11.30pm, Sat,
         Paramount) to Scorsese's head-crusher CASINO (10pm, Sun,
         C4)... while Pete McCarthy's DESPERATELY SEEKING SOMETHING
         (7.30pm, Sun, C4) groks the water-brothers who've based
         their religion around defensible Heinlein novel, Stranger In
         A Strange Land... appallingly titled THEWEBSTORY.COM
         (7.30pm, Mon, BBC2) presumably retreads the "success" of Bob
         Cringely's recent C4 net history, though without the
         "advantage" of all his out-takes from Triumph Of The Nerds,
         and presumably restricted to the boring old WWW... who's on
         the most drugs: whoever commissioned the zillionth gritty,
         realistic etc police drama THE COPS (9pm, Mon, BBC2)? or
         whoever thought that C4's contribution to the narcotics
         debate (most evenings, special "season") wouldn't end up
         like "Smack Me Up Gun-Bitch" from The Adam And Joe Show?...
         banks=Nazis, uncovers TIMEWATCH (9pm, Tue, BBC2)... and
         whose sex lives would you rather not know about: precocious
         adolescents in shock-doc TEEN SPIRIT (10.40pm, Tue, ITV)? or
         Jonathan Ross, Carol Smillie and Vanessa Feltz - not
         together, we hope! - in THE TRUTH ABOUT... SEX APPEAL (9pm,
         Tue, ITV)?... fresh, new LATE LUNCH "WITH MEL AND SUE" (6pm,
         Wed, C4) now only once a week, presumably to avoid spreading
         ingredients too thinly... and there's hope for parents
         everywhere, as polite mum Janet learns to love death metal
         while on tour with "Cradle Of Filth" in LIVING WITH THE
         ENEMY (9pm, Wed, BBC2) - the band responsible for such
         jaunty toe-tapping albums as "The Principle Of Evil Made
         Flesh", "Dark Faerytales In Phallustein", and (who could
         forget?) "Total Fucking Darkness"...

         FILM>> some above-average history-plundering this time from
         Disney, but the same terrible songs in MULAN (imdb:
         cross-dressing / training / martial-arts / china /
         based-on-true-story / boot-camp / disney-animated-feature /
         based-on-poem / women-soldiers / folklore / dragon / legend
         / army-life / impersonation / sexism / cricket). And good to
         see McDonalds saluting the youth-feminist message with their
         tie-in Oriental (Spare) McRib... plus a better-than-usual
         Hitchcock remake - though lacking Dial M For Murder's
         original 3D gimmick - twists and turns through A PERFECT
         MURDER (imdb: power / affair-extramarital / greed / jealousy
         / murder / artist / money) - described by Roger Ebert as
         part of his "Fatal Basic" genre (sex between bad people who
         live in good houses - and one of them is usually Michael
         Douglas)... otherwise it's limited-release French stuff -
         THE DREAM LIFE OF ANGELS (imdb [under "Vie rêvée des anges,
         La"]: playboy / friendship / suicide / dreams / hospital /
         coma / shoplifting / class-differences / sewing-machine /
         casual-work / young-woman) or RIEN NE VA PLUS (imdb:
         black-comedy / mafia / gambling / deception / role-playing /
         thief / money). Quelle horreur!...

         RED BOOK AUDIO>> is it just us, or does the new U2 single
         sound just like cult '80s Frankenstein tribute "China In
         Your Hand", by T'PAU?... still no news of whether ACE OF
         BASS really are going to sue T-SPOON for "Sex On The Beach"
         sounding too much like AOB's 1993 hit, "The Sign". And why
         doesn't the blonde one in Ace Of Bass ever appear in
         interviews or videos or even properly in focus on the cover
         of the new album? It's because *she's being hunted by a
         stalker!*... our top compilation of the moment: CD number 2
         stuck to the front of clearly desperate, objectively
         disgusting Nestle brekkie cereal GOLDEN GRAHAMS. (Very)
         varied Radio 1 Evening Session-style highlights include the
         first RIALTO single, and almost BRA-like novelty techno from
         THE EGG and upcoming album-mongers FUZZ TOWNSEND - who, in
         both name and musicianship, remind us of the theme from '70s
         kids Saturday morning TV show, The Fun Factory... ORBITAL
         tell NME their new album will be most "jolly" so far,
         promise single consisting entirely of samples of Rolf Harris
         Stylophone... tribute band for PUFF DADDY pick unfortunate,
         all-too predictable name of MUFF DADDY... which *is* the
         best UK music news site? http://www.dotmusic.com , or that
         "Dominator" guy who just lists all the current singles
         releases?... and finally, farewell to AntiNews instigators
         THE SHAMEN, who finally halt their shameless partying like
         its 1989 with their new, final album UV due Monday 19/10/98.
         (Intentionally) hilarious sign-off at http://www.nemeton.com
         warns shocked fans that no material "will be given
         further terrestrial release", though the band "will continue
         to collaborate, via their higher aspects, in the 4th
         Dimension". The band blame mathematical differences...


                               >> SMALL PRINT <<

       Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
         happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
       on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
     nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
     It is registered at the Post Office as "more viewers than New Media Age" 
                      http://stats.oyster.co.uk/nma/

                                 NEED TO KNOW
            THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK.
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