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  • NTK 2007
  • NTK 2006
  • NTK 2005
  • NTK 2004
  • NTK 2003
  • NTK 2002
  • NTK 2001
  • NTK 2000
  • NTK 1999
  • 25/12/98
    Holiday Special #8
    Christmas InDin with all the trimmings
  • 18/12/98
    #75
    politic, politics, quake fragfests, politics
  • 11/12/98
    #74
    making a stand, cyberstrikes and proof of a CONSPIRACY
  • 04/12/98
    #73
    Wassenaar, Flavor Flav, Zope!
  • 27/11/98
    #72
    Netscape dies, Cliffilms, Chocolata
  • 20/11/98
    #71
    Phantom Menace, Patches as Art, and Wiki
  • 13/11/98
    #70
    Domains, Ataris, and Tommy Flowers
  • 06/11/98
    #69
    Mark thingy, Christian whatsisname, and Scawen scary name
  • 30/10/98
    #68
    HipCrime, Tron and Halloweeeeen
  • 23/10/98
    #67
    More Tales From The Crypt, Sunbather Falco and Roobarb
  • 16/10/98
    #66
    ADSL, John Prescott, and the Anarchist Bookfair
  • 09/10/98
    #65
    DVD 1 Industry 0, XFM, and Funny Food
  • 02/10/98
    #64
    Sky Digitalis, Clickety-Click
  • 25/09/98
    #63
    Dixons Docks, Orwell Knocks, but Flash gets it clean
  • 18/09/98
    #62
    ISP trust, RISC PC busts, and homeless IT bosses
  • 11/09/98
    #61
    Starr networks, Ya Basta Blasters, token Windows software
  • 04/09/98
    #60
    Explorer runs out of memories, PGP 6, and Pat
  • 28/08/98
    #59
    Whose whois, Gameboy hacking, San Francisco
  • 21/08/98
    Holiday Special #7
    BT Highway Robbery, Bab5 Wrap Party,
    CU Amiga RIP
  • 14/08/98
    Holiday Special #6
    Strange Customs, OpenSource Meet, Victorian Net
  • 07/08/98
    #58
    Microsoft doublethink, Beebisms, Resfest
  • 31/07/98
    #57
    Net myths, Spy cams, and Hartley Hare
  • 24/07/98
    #56
    Beeb Falco, Millions Lost, and Dave "King Stupid" Green
  • 17/07/98
    #55
    Apple booms, DES doomed, DEFCON reaches VI
  • 10/07/98
    #54
    iMacs, Script Kiddies, and Is He Serious?
  • 03/07/98
    #53
    Ireland, Italy, and the End of The World
  • 26/06/98
    #52
    Net censors, Psion, and dead as a SOHO
  • 19/06/98
    #51
    Nominaughtiness, databastardery, and Patrick Moore event
  • 12/06/98
    #50
    BT goes cheap, Doc Solomon goes West, and ICQ goes downmarket
  • 05/06/98
    #49
    No news, street news, sweet news
  • 29/05/98
    #48
    @Home, Ross' Foundation, Power Renames
  • 22/05/98
    #47
    Gateswar!, Open Source flightsim, and a happy birthday
  • 15/05/98
    #46
    MacOS X, Anarchist Studies, and bloody Killer Net
  • 08/05/98
    #45
    Red Buses, Apple iMacs, more Killer Net
  • 01/05/98
    #44
    Crypto policy, IMDB sales, MP3 in your car
  • 24/04/98
    #43
    Falcomania, ICA knobbled, Spacewar!
  • 17/04/98
    #42
    BIB rumours, Intel downturn, and Dougie Coupland
  • 10/04/98
    #41
    RIPE.NET, Microsoft bribes, Richard 'Trek Wars' Barry
  • 03/04/98
    #40
    Demon sales, USENET wars, MOZILLA!
  • 27/03/98
    #39
    JavaOne, Edge Dunderheads, Virtual Turntables
  • 20/03/98
    #38
    LineOne, Scallywag, and Fete de l'Internet
  • 13/03/98
    #37
    Crypto, Technorealists, Crypto-Technorealists
  • 06/03/98
    #36
    Gates and the Senators, IWF takes their PICS, Bull Electronic
  • 27/02/98
    #35
    BIB backtracking, Hacker witch hunts, UKCAC
  • 20/02/98
    #34
    Crypto shenanigans, Alledged Jobs nuttiness, Action SuperCross
  • 13/02/98
    #33
    Key escrow, Tempest spooks, XML
  • 06/02/98
    #32
    Bill flanned, Postel goes postal, mealy MILIA melee
  • 30/01/98
    #31
    Compaq gobble DEC, Bill damage-limits, Time Crisis 2
  • 23/01/98
    #30
    Netscape lose the source,
    CU Amiga "sucks dogs", Pinker speaks!
  • 16/01/98
    #29
    Excite gets kids, Dennis has kittens, Webmedia kicks bucket
  • 09/01/98
    #28
    Microsoft mad, Apple make money, the zine scene
  • NTK 1997
  • HARD NEWS
  • ANTI-NEWS
  • EVENT QUEUE
  • TRACKING
  • MEMEPOOL
  • GEEK MEDIA
  • SMALL PRINT
 _   _ _____ _  __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the UK>
| \ | |_   _| |/ / _ __   ____20/03/98_ o Join! Mail 'subscribe ntknow'
|  \| | | | | ' / | '_ \ / _ \ \ /\ / / o  to majordomo@unfortu.net
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|_| \_| |_| |_|\_\|_| |_|\___/ \_/\_/   o     http://www.ntk.net/


           "Douglas Rushkoff writes that watching his PalmPilot link
           with his PC 'was like watching a mouse rape an elephant'.
          Such casual use of a violent metaphor is a sad reminder of
           the 'toys for the boys' attitude that is so common in the
           computer industry, an industry that is still, apparently,
          geared towards the satisfaction of male sexual fantasies."
                             - GUARDIAN ONLINE reader EZRI CARLEBACH
              the sexual fantasies of male mice - or male elephants?


                               >> HARD NEWS <<
                             overly worthy views

         Okay, this is getting *silly*. It's now over a month since
         the UK government almost announced their policy on key
         escrow. Following that flurry of cancelled meetings, DTI
         officials said that an announcement would follow in "in
         another two weeks". Then we got the strongest hint yet that
         a statement would be made today in answer to a written
         question in Parliament. But now the DTI are now saying that
         it could happen - "within the next few days". Not that
         we're complaining: the ideal solution would be no statement
         at all. But we're curious as to the postponement. Could it
         be to do with the fact that this week Janet Reno, of the US
         Department of Justice, finally stated that they were not
         pursuing the domestic control of strong encryption? Or that
         this was the week when BT Labs cracked a weak version of a
         relatively new crypto-system, demonstrating the importance
         of strong protection? Or that this was the one week that
         Whit Diffie, inventor of public-key encryption and vocal
         opponent to key escrow, is over in the UK? Maybe not. It's
         probably just the DTI trying to stop the Home Office
         pushing through an old policy that not even its DTI
         creators believe in any more. Gad, are we that cynical?
         http://www.computerprivacy.org/archive/03171998-5.shtml
                                         - cops say no to key escrow
         http://www.labs.bt.com/projects/security/crackers/
         - illegal under last week's proposed EC legislation, by the way
         http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/Author=Diffie%2C%20Whitfield
                         - stop us if we're getting too sincere here

         Good rule of thumb for prospective Murdoch partners: if he
         seems as pleased with the deal as you are, you're missing
         something. Newscorp, until recently happy to file LINEONE
         under "ingenious tax write-offs", have been having a shakey
         time with their BT co-owners. Despite increased
         subscriptions (taking the service to a respectable 70,000+
         from a rubbish 30,000 six months ago), and a swift tie-in
         with the BIB digital TV boxes, both sides seemed itchy for
         some payback. Enter United News & Media, who, with the
         enthusiasm of the Net newbie, fork over ten million UKP for
         a 33% share and the dubious privilege of sinking all
         *their* hot media assets (Meridian, HTV, Anglia, PR
         Newswire, The Express, Daily Star) into the obscurity of
         LineOne's walled garden. Meanwhile, down amongst the walled
         garden gnomes, veteran "virtual community" CIX got a
         management buy-in from a group backed by Legal & General
         Ventures. Cix "mom and pop" Keith and Sylvia Thornley get
         to hang around for three years. Their role is undefined,
         but will no doubt involve a lot of - what's that CIX
         phrase? Wibbling?
         http://www.unm.com/index2d.htm
                        - the "two-dimensional" United Media Website
         http://www.cix.co.uk/
           -L&G after those CIX bikers' insurance premiums, we guess
         http://www.landg.com/
               - I think we've lost the American readers on this one

         SIMON "www.scallywag.org" REGAN *is* a bit mad, what with
         his Princess Diana murder conspiracies, his louche
         obsessions regarding Pamplona bullfighting, and his dogged
         pursuit of unlikely sleaze against prominent politicians.
         So when he got done for "borrowing" the contents of ex-
         minister of defence Michael Portillo's hard-drive via a guy
         who was supposed to be "cleaning" it for the MP, we assumed
         it would be another unhappy story of a eccentric hack
         getting done for his fixations. Luckily for Regan, the case
         just got thrown out. And luckily for everyone else, a legal
         principle was thrown out too. The Criminal Prosecution
         Service attempted to nab Regan on the dreaded Misuse of
         Computers Act. If this case fell, any journalist who -
         wittingly or not - received data on a digitally stored
         medium could be prosecuted for "unauthorised access to
         computer information" - even if receiving the same data on
         a piece of paper would break no law. The judge ruled that
         the guy clearing the disk was authorised to copy it. Good
         to see the old "for backup purposes" excuse getting a legal
         footing.
         http://www.scallywag.org/
                    - wonder how this effects the Gary Glitter case?


                               >> ANTI-NEWS <<
                             berating the obvious

         C|NET scoops with IE bug story Yoz broke in October -
         http://www.yoz.com/ie40/ ... LIVE AND KICKING gets "busty"
         computer-generated presenter... YAHOO! execs sell stock...
         Marc Andreessen sells stock... Space Station "may be
         delayed", admits NASA... POLYDOR takes down
         www.ianbrown.co.uk message board: users, they say, not
         talking enough about Ian Brown... Pentagon hackers turn out
         not to be British after all... COMPUTER ACTIVE sells barely
         20% of its 650,000 print run... BMG INTERACTIVE -
         publishers of Grand Theft Auto, You Don't Know Jack -
         bought out by fellow controv-mongers TAKE 2 - publishers of
         Lula The Sexy Empire, Postal... Marvel's X-FORCE go to
         Burning Man... "ISPs say Internet Demand Exceeds
         Technology", reveals INFORMATION WEEK... Gates "speaks with
         pronunced nasal drawl", uncovers REUTERS... STEVE BOXER
         claims that Sega's OUTRUN was made by Nintendo... REBECCA
         EISENBERG comes third in Net Diva poll, after Kim Polese
         and Pamela Anderson... NASA astronaut takes Pilot on Mir;
         forgets hotsync cable... you get a $10 discount off GRAND
         THEFT AUTO in Australia if you have a parking violation...


                              >> EVENT QUEUE <<
                        goto's considered non-harmful

         Can't make it to Hannover, Germany for CeBIT, the "the
         world's biggest IT event" [19/03/98 - 25/03/98]? Put off by
         ZDNet's descriptions of "heavy rain", "sleet or snow" and
         the "four-storey" Siemens Nixdorf stand, which apparently
         requires its own elevators? Console your Euro-techno
         yearnings with the news that, on 06/04/98, the BBC will be
         recording a special German edition of TOP OF THE POPS, and
         are currently looking for audience members, aged 17-25, to
         be both "extrovert" and "German speaking" - undermining the
         common belief that the two might be mutually exclusive.
         http://www.messe.de/ch98/index_e.html
                                - then next week, it's "CeBIT Home"!
         http://www.bbc.co.uk/tickets/tvtvc.shtml#totpgerman
                  - Beethoven? Kraftwerk? Nena? Culture Beat? FALCO?

         Meanwhile, friendly neighbours of Germany, the French, are
         holding their FETE DE L'INTERNET [20/3/98 - 21/3/98]. The
         festival will include over 500 events, none of which
         travels well via Babelfish, and is aimed at encouraging the
         tardy French republic to throw off its Minitel chains and
         take to the Interactive Malls. The uniquely Gallic addition
         to the (digital) revolution is a "show trial" of the Net,
         held in a real Parisian Court. The Net is accused of
         murdering time, space and liberty, dividing society and
         spreading filth and English. "A young handcuffed actress
         dressed with specially designed 'cyber-clothes' will play
         the defendant's role," adds the NY Times, unnecessarily.
         http://www.cie.fr/proces/
                               - about time we had a reign of terror
         http://www.fete-internet.fr/
                              - ou sont les GIFs des personnes nues?


                                >> TRACKING <<
                                  grep nuts

         We admit that we haven't play-tested VOODOO EXTREME's
         recent battery of Golden Oldies, reinterpreted for the 3D
         accelerated lifestyle, because we're still typing this into
         a Hercules monochrome card - but we've had enough mails to
         suggest you check them out. If you too have a 3D
         accelerator, that is. The programs were written over a
         short time-frame by intense young people who, in a more
         civilized age, would have been burned at the stake for
         their Amiga demos. Reviews are mixed: humble NTK subscriber
         Canis Lupus requests you take a look at his Braben Virus-
         inspired work CHAGA, while outspoken cartoonist Charlie
         Brooker says that many of them are "frankly, rubbish. But
         what the hey."
         http://www.voodooextreme.com/
         - this isn't going to help your popularity one bit, Brooker

         Continuing this week's "Not Tested On Animals" theme, NTK
         is proud to report that SIGNUM 1100 DX *appears* to be a
         beta software implementation of the Akai S1100 professional
         sampler, although neither we (nor proper musician and
         tipster Erich Wehmeyer) have the instructions or experience
         to get it working properly yet. Erich also alerts us to the
         imminent new version of TB303 soundalike REBIRTH (now with
         "seamless Cubase interface", apparently), which we'll tie
         in with our rumour that Rebirth distributors Steinberg may
         soon do a similar deal with neat little Netherlands drum
         machine HAMMERHEAD.
         http://www.signum.it/1100/1100.htm
                   - and you may ask yourself, "How do I work this?"
         http://www.propellerheads.se
                              - no, not the ones with Shirley Bassey
         http://inside.hku.nl/~bram/hammer/index.htm
                                             - give the drummer some


                                >> MEMEPOOL <<
                              hasta la altavista

         GAMEBOY digital camera vs www.reality.demon.co.uk/tyco.htm
         ... imminent FALCO alert: www.teletubby.co.uk ... "DAVE
         GREEN" bylines are tech journo equivalent of "Alan Smithee"
         films, we hear... Amiga PREBOX... DILBERT TV show "next
         season"... imaginative carbuncles at www.fat.co.uk ... ARM
         floats... http://www.404notfound.com ... TIMES INTERACTIVE
         present: http://found.cs.nyu.edu/dfox/monkey.htm ...
         SPOILER ALERT: http://www.rhk.dk/users/neelix/st9full.html
         ... Acclaim to do SOUTH PARK videogame - will it be as good
         as the www.enlightenment.org desktop?... LARA CROFT movie
         to be produced by DIE HARD team... more euphemisms for
         WANKER at www.pe.net/~scotta/digitalconcepts/wristpilot.htm
         ... WINDOWS DIANA... NETLINK techies leaving in droves...
         http://www.henson.com/workshop/muppeteer_workshop.htm ...


                               >> GEEK MEDIA <<
           why don't you turn in and do something less interesting?

         TV >> yeah, this first series eventually runs out of ideas
         and tonight's Trainspotting spoof is a bit predictable, but
         the long-overdue repeats of THE ADAM AND JOE SHOW (11.05pm,
         Fri, C4) are - predictably - bedsittingly brilliant...
         Courtney Pine improvises a "Jazz Turing Test" at the climax
         of TOMORROW'S WORLD MEGALAB (8pm, Fri, BBC1)... and,
         disappointingly, John Grisham thriller THE CLIENT (9.30pm,
         Fri, BBC1) isn't the Java-hearing courtroom drama we'd all
         hoped for... if those aren't cosmetic contact lenses, then
         they must be STARS IN THEIR EYES (7pm, Sat, ITV)... did
         Carrie "Leia" Fisher get into script-doctoring (eg, Speed)
         purely on the strength of the snappy dialogue in POSTCARDS
         FROM THE EDGE (9pm, Sat, C4)?... after RUBY WAX MEETS
         (9.55pm, Sun, BBC1), there's been almost enough to do a
         whole Jerry Springer show on "We Interviewed Jerry And
         Thought We Were Being Original And Cool"... and sticking
         with the chat theme, THE ENTERTAINMENT BIZ (9pm, Sun, BBC2)
         stalks the real-life Larry Sanders - Jay Leno, Conan
         O'Brien, and (one hopes) David Letterman... tragically, the
         UK won't be getting the MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000'S
         ACADEMY OF ROBOTS' CHOICE AWARDS SPECIAL on the Sci-Fi
         Channel on Oscar night (with commentary on scenes from
         Titanic, Good Will Hunting, Starship Troopers etc)... so we
         say skip tedious luvvie-fest THE PLAYER (12midnight, Mon,
         BBC1) for the warped notions about time travel espoused in
         FOR THE LOVE OF (11.5pm, Mon, C4)... plus, continuing 7
         days devoted to nature's very own polar solvent, the
         maddest title of the BBC's whole Water Week has to be the
         10-minute evolutionary psychologist musings in WET DREAMS
         (10.20pm, Thu, BBC2)...

         FILM >> some doubts about whether they really could extract
         a DNA sample (mitochondrial or otherwise) from a single
         eyelash, as they do in darkly arty futuristic thinker - and
         A, C, T, G anagram - GATTACA (imdb: sci-fi / thriller /
         drama / wheelchair / fraud / futuristic / mistaken-identity
         / swimming / paralysis / dance / vacuum-cleaner / blood /
         space-travel / cellular-biology / gene-manipulation /
         brothers / murder / police / detective). NTK forensic
         experts say: ah, but what if it had *attached root or
         sheath material*?... hours of fun for London cinemagoers
         (the rest of the UK must wait 2 weeks), spotting
         anachronisms from 1997 in the supposedly 1995-set
         Tarantino-by-numbers effort JACKIE BROWN (imdb: crime /
         comedy / heist / vulgarity / based-on-novel / gun / drama /
         betrayal). Goofs include a '97 calendar, the video game 688
         Hunter/Killer, oh and lots of slightly old, tired actors
         wading through the usual Pulp Fiction-era dialogue...
         subtler timeshifts betray THE MAN IN THE IRON MASK (imdb:
         action / romance / drama / father-son / twins /
         swashbuckler / France / based-on-novel / royalty / prison /
         french-revolution) - the DiCaprio cash-in claims to be set
         in 1660, yet historical events suggest it's more like 1675.
         Also, we somehow doubt that The Three Musketeers use the
         word "tits" in the original novel..

         FEEBDACK >> Our first real pledge for the anti-Microsoft
         Bill-a-thon! Following Monday's NTK Live Show (all-too
         unedited highlights at http://www.ntk.net/live/ ), MICHAEL
         FUCHS - of Stanford medNET - promises "we will not purchase
         a copy of FrontPage for each of our ten staff members.
         Additionally, we pledge not to upgrade our copies of Word,
         even as Internet Assistant for Word continues to develop
         the most rudimentary capabilities." That's the spirit,
         Michael; together we can beat that puny $30bn software
         giant!... are you blind?, queries JAY: apparently,
         Chieftain Tank Lasers aren't exclusive to Bull Electrical
         ["see" NTK 03/06/98], as the optic-friendly Army surplus
         store in Nottingham's Cattle Market sells them as "5 mile
         range, non-eye safe - would suit hobbyist." Begging the
         question, writes Jay: *what kind of hobbyist*?!... LEON
         BROCARD argues that our lame URLs so far haven't been
         "silly or long enough", backing the claim with a list of
         his top 50 - see http://www.ntk.net/longerthanthis/ -
         including that megasyllabic Welsh village, plus the oxford-
         and-cambridge-examinations-and-assessment-council close
         behind... DAVE MURPHY was equally unimpressed by
         www.therapyquestionmark.co.uk (for grunge-punk band
         Therapy?) - those darn RFCs, hey?... after our last
         magazine round-up [NTK 13/03/98], an, er, ANONYMOUS READER
         gleefully spills the beans on a focus group he attended for
         a new "digital imaging" mag, which he describes as looking
         "like a bad cross between .net and Amateur Photographer."
         It might be from Future, it might cost a fiver, and it
         might be called "Image". It's like Ain't It Cool News
         around here... finally, a couple of quick omissions/
         corrections: JON PETERSON recks that Macromedia Fireworks
         is just a "re-hash" of Fauve Matisse, which came with the
         company when they bought Xres: sorry, Jon, we were
         struggling with the less ancient PC beta... and second, BEN
         MOOR points out that Tracey Ann Oberman, rather than Trevyn
         McDowell (as we claimed), is the Comedy Nation actress
         allegedly obsessed with science fiction (especially Dune).
         NTK apologises unreservedly for any distress caused...


                              >> SMALL PRINT <<

      Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
        happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
      on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
    nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
       It is registered at the Post Office as "Linux enough for you?".
                    ( http://www.eklektix.com/lwn/ )

                                 NEED TO KNOW
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  • HARD NEWS
  • ANTI-NEWS
  • EVENT QUEUE
  • TRACKING
  • MEMEPOOL
  • GEEK MEDIA
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